#1 Relationship Let Down Happening On First Dates with Men
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– #1 Relationship Let Down Happening On First Dates with Men
It seems as if you over analyze every aspect when dating. Do you think that makes women uncomfortable and they are unable to continue relationships with you?
I share publicly my inner world, which includes analysis.
Let’s not be nit picky. We need more men to communicate better period.
Yes. I agree.
He’s a dating coach, if he didn’t analyse it all he wouldn’t have any content. He’s analytical to learn and look at it from all aspects and angles.
Sorry it didn’t work out, Jonathan. You have a great attitude. IDK if that’s a Buddhist thing (not judging experience on the outcome), or a man thing? Which is it? I think it’s Jonathan Gray who aaid men are used to rejection bc they do the initiating. That’s why rejection is more difficult for women. Women take it hard when they like someone. Statistically, men remarry way more quickly than women. Wonder if it’s bc men don’t feel as deeply.
I don’t agree with J. Gray
I’m sorry it didn’t work out but happy that you felt the excitement of possible love again. It’s still there! I once met a man thru app. We got along perfectly on phone… wanted same thing, great conversation, common interests, etc. This went on for a week or more. When we met,, the spark wasn’t there. As you said physical first date is deal maker or breaker. Thank you so much for sharing what many of us on dating apps go thru too. Janie
I do believe it’s easier for men to find a new relationship than it is for women. I think there are more eligible appropriate women than men seeking a relationship. It’s a numbers game
Do you think “no chemistry” is code for not sexually attracted?
Ever think about the women that were/are married off to men they don’t like or love? The horror!
Maybe
Nothing matters til you meet in real life
Jonathan once again you deliver gold. You acted in courage and integrity and showed us what it’s all about. One gigantic step closer to your person and this woman inspires me to continue my journey of healing which takes huge courage. I admire you more each time you share. Thank you Jonathon.
I certainly hope she didn’t have doubts before you drove 4 hours with an overnight. I’m also surprised she didn’t pay for the one meal you had together since you traveled there . Dif she have suggestions on something to do? Like check out some activities in that area? Dinner and some live music? Bowling? You know, a date. Or was it to meet to continue the deep, introspective discussions?
We both had doubts… having doubts is normal. In the end, does a connection outweigh the doubts?
I am so sorry she did not feel chemistry. You will find your lady. ❤
That’s a long first date. Lol
I drove 280 miles is why ..
Did you do most of the talking? You’ll get back on the horse and try again. Don’t worry, you’re practicing meeting somene special. I would tell someone there isn’t chemistry rather than knowing I couldn’t be in a relationship with that person and this finalizes it.
She did the right thing.
Thank you jonathon for your honesty
Awe thank you 😊
Sorry to hear things didn’t work out. Thanks for your honesty & vulnerability. Honestly, I think chemistry is overrated because it’s not really that important in the big picture. I think chemistry is part of the initial romantic phase and that evolves hopefully into a realistic mutual strong friendship. And what makes a relationship heathy & successful is the continual nurturing of that strong friendship/companionship.
You have a great attitude and it’s nice to see you are now open to long-distance relationships. The silver lining is that at least you found out sooner than later your recent date wasn’t feeling it. There are plenty of fishes in the sea. Back to fishing again. HUGS
Agreed….for me chemistry isn’t permanent per se, like “looks/attraction”, chemistry gets your foot in the door so you can build a deeper connection (beyond things in common on paper)…Problem is people date in a microwave fashion where they expect grandiose “feeeelings” (what they mislabel “chemistry”) and quickly move on chasing the next feeeeeling.
Thanks for your perspective!
11:27…I think we need to allow time for chemistry to build in person and away from the devices. Years ago I spent all night talking to a guy, we appeared to be hitting it off but when we met in person, I wasn’t feeling it.
Chemistry is overrated and can grow as you better get to know someone. Too bad.
I love the transparency of your personal dating. I just subscribed.
Awe… thanks 😊
Jonathon, thank you for being so vulnerable and transparent with us❤sending you Love, Light and Blessings
I think meeting online is usually not a good avenue for meeting someone. A lot of effort, false hopes and unrealistic expectations ensue. It feels really artificial all round. Exceptions of course. Time to get out into the community, gauge physical attraction and then invest the time and energy.
I’m going to listen. Just starting. But people are different. I am an introvert. I will shut down in the presence of a man I am attracted to UNTIL I get to know him better. If I was a good match for you [I don’t think I am] and started experiencing feelings through vid chats not knowing you in person, I would immediately shut down in the 1st date because my heart opened before I felt safe. A wise man would generate safety around me and get to know me. Because my heart would re-open once I felt safe, became comfortable, and forged an in person bond. I think a lot of people don’t feel themselves shut down, so they don’t understand ebb & flow. Turning dating into fast food drive through experiences? Checking for instant chemistry? It’s a one night stand type “test”. It’s not reality. 🙂
Connecting from a distance makes it more difficult to connect later in person. People protect their hearts. If your heart opens apart from meeting in person, self-protective shutdown will happen 1st date.
K, I will listen to the tape. 🙂
Chemistry to me is like sparks in the air – you just feel it and hopefully so does the other person. I wish I could contain my feelings a bit better though as I can start moving my hair around and I find it hard to concentrate on eating my dinner 😂
A typical ♈ lol
Thank you for sharing your story! You’re very brave 😊 I would love to meet a man like you. I think I have a broken “picker” – many men I have dated seem to initially tell me they want an “all in” type of relationship only to change their minds after several months when the “all in” idea becomes real and they get scared or become overwhelmed 😢
I’m sure that stung, JA. I’m sorry. Giselle was right to give you kudos for doing what you feel is right, regardless of what anyone thinks.