4 tests to take if you are dealing with a narcissist
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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.
My husband totally ignores ANYTHING I say. So does his clone, my older daughter.
My ex and youngest here
hereditary neurological condition
Same
My ex and both my daughters
Same …why do I even bother?
Mine doesn’t even answer questions like “what are you watching on tv?” (Zero answer), or “how are your parents?” (If you cared you’d call them!). I’ve given up!
When we walk together i stop to say hi to the neighbours and pet the dogs. He just keeps walking!
Cuz weโre invisible to them!
Then stop following him. Let him go
Same stuff different circumstances. Always walk ahead of me, sometimes he would just disappear when I stopped for a child or a neighbor or dog. This hurt so much and was so frustrating. Filled me with true astonishment as to why!
Same stuff different circumstances. Always walk ahead of me, sometimes he would just disappear when I stopped for a child or a neighbor or dog. This hurt so much and was so frustrating. Filled me with true astonishment as to why!
And to add to this I would feel embarrassed by his behavior. I took the shame and blame ! Why is this phenomenon a thing? Dr Ramani why do we take on the shame for someoneโs bad behaviour?
Oh I wish I knew 30 years ago just a fraction of what you’ve taught me , Dr. Ramani!
Me too. It would be great if more was taught about healthy relationships and how to manage things in school. Thanks Dr Ramani โค
Same here, 40 years ago. It wasn’t until my youngest pointed out about 10 years ago that the husband is a narcissist, and I started researching the personality that I. far too late, realized that it isn’t me with the problems (as I have been told). It is hm. I’m not naive enough to know that I don’t have issues of my own, but it has been a bit of a rude awakening to the truth of my so-called marriage.
Sameโค
@@costelloandlizzievolk2233 I agree.
@@janeviolette566 well said.
Bird test – a narcissist would probably stop to look so they can gaslight you and say they donโt see it ๐
As though narcissists wonโt ask the question and gaslight you that there IS a bird there and you just arenโt seeing it
@@kyze8284that too! Thankfully Iโm the outside observer in this situation but itโs hard watching someone you very much care about be forced to interact with said narcissist
I do not ask narcs any questions period. If they say it is raining, you will have to look outside and see the rain fir yourself before you believe what the narc said.
When I experience this blatant, passive aggressive form of lying, it makes me so infuriated ๐ค
I dated someone for several months who, when i got covid and it hit pretty hard, actually said to me in writing, “i have put you first for three days. When is it my turn again?”
And what my mom did to my dad when he had brain cancer is unreal. She punishes people who need something from her.
I gave birth to his first son had a very difficult c section and finally got home I was up early in the morning nursing our son, he looked at me and said couldn’t you at least put some make up on…๐ข
I’m a recovering anorexic. At the height of my illness, while I was in recovery, the woman who raised me told me, โOh yeah, you could lose another 10 pounds,โ while we were discussing a bridesmaid dress. I remember thinking, โThatโs exactly what I donโt need to hear while trying to recover.โ
Iโm really sorry you had to hear that, especially at such a vulnerable time. ๐
My husband would give a 2 second acknowledgement of the bird and then would proceed to give me a five or ten minute description of some bird that he had seen 5 years ago. He has to be bigger and better about everything.๐ข
Same. I get a tirade. How much he knows about birds….
Lol same.
exactly this…even if you know million times more on a certain topic
Last fall, I went for a walk while on vacation with my mom. I passed out along the road and woke up with a broken humerus and no idea where I was. Someone found me and the cops found my mom. After the ambulance ride, the X-rays, ct scans, and all the time in the er. We went back to the condo and my mom looked at me and said, you havenโt even apologized to me yet (for going on a walk and not telling her). Iโm a 45 year old woman. Avid hiker and physically fit person. It really hit deeply.
My husband insisted on watching the basketball game during my labor and delivery and the birth of his child. So much for being the birth โcoach.โ Thank god for empathetic nurses who checked in on me often.
I hear you! If married to narc do not allow them in delivery rm next time or ever, they have not earned the privilege of being present for delivery and like you pointed out, are no help and just make us feel worse at a most demanding time in our lives. If i had to do over, i would line up a best girlfriend to be my birth coach. And if sheโs a mother herself, even better, what a bonus to have someone who knows what iโm going through and be there 100% for me. Kick the husbands out of such a sacred event if they cant be fully present and helpful. God bless you and hang in there, you are not alone, others have been there and understand! Hugs to you!
When I pointed out how the shape of a tree looked like a dinosaur his response was “you’ve got too much time on your hands”. It made me feel like I couldn’t point out anything ever again.
When dealing with narcissism, you should know that itโs not personal. โIt isnโt personalโ is one of those cliches used to cushion all kinds of bad actions taken by people who need an out for being immoral, but in this case it actually gets near the truth. Narcissists donโt know how to love or be a friend; they canโt afford to spare the energy to learn, because theyโre always in a state of high emergency, cataloging potential threats and redoubling their defenses. When they claim to love you, it means nothing. They may even think they mean it, but they donโt understand the concept – they canโt feel it.
They never attach to you or anyone else. Other people are paper cut-outs to the narcissist, like those cardboard figures of celebrities you pose next to for a selfie. Narcissist value their own children only as mirrors of themselves. When they destabilize you or attack you, it means nothing. They are stuck in an endless conversation with themselves, in which you are an inanimate object, to be assigned their own faults and used as a surrogate punching bag for their hatred of themselves.
When they toss you out, itโs no more meaningful than a junkie tossing away a needle; when they try to reel you back in, it only means that they tired of the new drug and need a hit of the old. None of this is personal. Theyโre too terrified to have personal relationships, opting instead for extraction of admiration from a subservient partner whose range of action they strictly constrain. This is not personal. None of it. The narcissist does not know who you are – it doesnโt know how to know other people. Like the vampire or the chainsaw-wielding creature in the horror film, itโs from another world, bereft of the concept of human connection. Additionally, If you need to find out about a Cheating Narcissist; send a request to: MetaspyHub@gmail. com
Are you narc teachers not Ted as well in the position youโre in? The Journey to the Center of the mind is about The movie โJourney to the center of the Earthโ which basically says others have been here before you in this search for the fix to the problem and whats the sense in starting it over and over in every new generation especially just to profit from it?
Well said! Thank you!
Exactly๐ฎ
I think they are trapped in a chain of others passing it to them to bear especially if they stepped up voluntarily to try like superman and then learned they are trapped. They have all the normal cares and emotions but the long chain and its end of the world threat takes a priority for them for being too deep in it. They can blend in well with others at times because they are the others. The psychopaths are what you are describing for the narcissists and everyone else is the narcissist fueling the psychopaths with the real mental problems that are then surfing it without a care like a cowabunga dude! The psychopaths probably continue to think they are Superman. Portrayals of it: YouTube LL Cool J – 6 Minutes of Pleasure (video) / Pantera – 5 Minutes Alone (video) / UHF – โStanly Rescueโ (837).
Love the ‘fart’ part. My late uncle would always say “scuse me” when his elderly wife farted. I asked him why and he said he it was to protect her feelings.
Never answering anything for fear of accountability and responsibility. Blame keeps him hiding. Literally.
I noticed this with a friend who came to visit. I live in a very beautiful popular area, and when we were touring around I would point out important landmarks or beautiful things, and she would barely acknowledge them. She seemed to have no interest in noticing the beautiful areas around us but just kept rambling on about herself. It was weird and uncomfortable. Sometimes when she was going on and on about herself I would close my eyes behind my sunglasses for a rest and she wouldnโt even notice! ๐
Returning home from a vacation for my 50th birthday. Now I know of course that my having a birthday was not going to work out very well. Driving home in an ear splitting silence, there was a huge round, orange, super moon. I’m like, look at the moon! As he stared straight ahead, no acknowledgment whatsoever about my joyous declaration, with a look of utter contempt. Thanks to guides like Dr. Ramani I made it out of that desperately sad situation but always wondered what that was, the moon thing, until now. Thank you Dr. Ramani. โค
I’ve realized that a lot of people I know fit these questions. Like, I’ve been inviting this into my life because it’s familiar. The video about parents a few weeks ago was crystal clarity. And now this. It’s all making sense – and now I can see the path to more healing, and my next chapter. Thank you Dr. Ramani!
My goodness! They never just answer the question! Theyโve gotta go on and on and on.