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If You’re Divorcing A Narcissist, You Need to Watch the Darrell Brooks Trial

If you're married to or in the process of divorcing a narcissist, covert narcissist, narcissistic husband, narcissistic wife or malignant narcissist, then you should watch videos from the Darrell Brooks trial.

He was found guilty of unaliving 6 people and injuring 60 more when he drove his car through the Christmas parade in Waukesha, Wisconsin last November (2021).

In true narcissistic fashion, he chose to represent himself, and the 3-week trial proved to be a case study in narcissism.

In this video, I'm highlighting 6 narcissistic traits that are obvious in Darrell Brooks' behavior during the trial. I hope this can help you prepare for what you'll be up against when you go to court with your narcissistic spouse.

If you need help, I'm here for you. You can book a one-on-one call with me by clicking the link below.

Or you can sign up for my next Narcissist Divorce Bootcamp™. It's the best way to get the support and guidance you need if you're dreaming of divorcing a narcissist, but you don't see how it would be possible. We're here to help get you ready to take action.

Find the next Narcissist Divorce Bootcamp™group program here:

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Andrew McLaurin
 

  • @CH-px1fw says:

    And his mother blames bipolar?! She’s delusional.

    • @shayvidatv says:

      He’s clearly a malignant narcissist with Oppositional Defiant disorder and Sociopath disorder. I don’t see alot of bipolar traits in that devil.

    • @zzzroxyzzz says:

      I know, I’m bipolar and I’ve never in my life seen anyone behave like him to that degree, I’m like no lady, don’t put that on people like myself who know right from wrong and have learned how to de escalate when we’re having a bad day, no her son is just a self righteous egotistical wreckless prick who happens to have bipolar.

    • @whereisyourhumanity7557 says:

      Why isn’t she charged as an accessory? She provided the weapon.

    • @bootsie1212 says:

      Indeed.

    • @lydiag6245 says:

      I was going to say, I bet his mother treated him like he could do no wrong !

  • @kristenpino4635 says:

    I just stumbled upon your channel, I watched this trial from start to finish. I am almost two years out of a very long relationship with a man who is exactly like this. The more he escalated the more I was triggered. When he did that stare down with the judge, the way his lips and eyes were I have seen that look on many occasions.

    • @VictoriaMcCooey says:

      First, welcome to my channel 🙂

      And yes, that stare! It must have triggered at least half of the people watching!

    • @jrodamores87 says:

      Omg the stare down gave me a full blown flashback. He would deny “looking at me any different”…. But the way Brooks looked at the judge- the eyes, the mouth… every single thing.

    • @Pinkheartbwell says:

      Kristen good for you for being free of that man. I have recently become free of narcissism from a couple of people actually, one being my ex boyfriend. I watched the whole trial also. Almost helped me make more peace with this persona and develop a sense of closure. Also helps me to really tune in to being mindful from now on. Not letting the charm and love bombing in the beginning be convincing. Finding self love.

    • @judithpetree6329 says:

      I had the distinct feeling that if he had been behind the wheel of a car, he would have run over the judge just as he did the people in the parade. I was glad she called him out on it.

  • @theREALESTrealistUNPOPULAR says:

    His narc showed the whole trial word salad, deflecting, distracting, redirecting and so much more.
    He tried to belittle his ex meanwhile he’s a sex offender.
    Crying to gain sympathy. I could go on

    • @VictoriaMcCooey says:

      Yes! A perfect case study!

    • @KrayZRyder says:

      Yes, his closing argument appeared to be an attempt of gaslighting the jury to pity him. Instead he bored them.

    • @theREALESTrealistUNPOPULAR says:

      @@KrayZRyder he actually pissed them off the more he spoke. Notice after the verdict was read there was no more coughing. I couldn’t be bored I was disgusted bc I grew up around this behavior so to even watch this was like HERE WE GO AGAIN

    • @innocentnemesis3519 says:

      His attempts to abuse his ex on the stand (I struggle to even think of her that way because as you pointed out, he is a convicted SO because he got her pregnant at 14!) were astounding to watch. Like how can he possibly think he is making himself look good?

    • @theREALESTrealistUNPOPULAR says:

      @@innocentnemesis3519 a narcs motto is “if I can cut your head off, that makes ME TALLER!”

  • @johnmichaelson9173 says:

    He said he’s not Darrell Brooks & then complained that he’s not receiving documents addressed to Darrell Brooks. He has off the charts delusions of grandeur & he’s shown no remorse whatsoever. His final statement when he supposedly started crying was just appalling.

    • @Jermeister12 says:

      Yeah John 😀He was all over the place😄

    • @VictoriaMcCooey says:

      Crocodile tears. Narcissists are masters of that!

    • @johnmichaelson9173 says:

      @@VictoriaMcCooey Thanks for the reply.Honestly I’ve never seen anyone show that much contempt for the families and victims in trial before. His sense of entitlement is off the charts all he cares about is himself & he’ll lie time and again to portray himself as the victim in all this.

    • @Pinkheartbwell says:

      @@VictoriaMcCooey I would totally give in to those crpcodile tears from my ex. I thought then he was showing acknowledgement from the negative things but it would continue on and on (after a small period of nice-ness). Thank God I’m free from that.

  • @eternity7477 says:

    The way he projected EVERYTHING he is guilty of onto others as well: As you said, everyone else is disrespectful, everyone else is lying, everyone else wasted time. The cherry on top was when he thought by telling the jury “to do the right thing”, that they would find him not guilty. His disconnect to reality was mind boggling

    • @VictoriaMcCooey says:

      Yes, they only see the world from their own narcissistic perspective.

    • @dianpan8132 says:

      Well, indeed the jury did the right thing!! He thought crying and being there when his kids were born that the jury would be sympathetic. They were sympathetic, alright….toward the victims, like the little boy whose parents will never hold him again. So heartbreaking. Thank God for justice!

    • @sharonhoyt2133 says:

      He was shocked that the Jury didn’t buy his story and grant him his freedom.

    • @beckylane4509 says:

      I love that you used mind-boggling 😆 did you see that part of trial when he kept saying that?

    • @VictoriaMcCooey says:

      @@beckylane4509 LOL I did! Maybe I used it subliminally 🙂

  • @reneewright8391 says:

    He said, “My conscience is clear.” That tops off his narc way of thinking. Gross.

    • @VictoriaMcCooey says:

      In my opinion, they have no conscience 🙂

    • @alexk9295 says:

      Yeah, that was crazy. He also talked about how we could never understand why it happened because god works in mysterious ways. And also that he warned people he was coming by honking his car.

    • @mcarter9839 says:

      @@VictoriaMcCooey Exactly, they just don’t have one. My mum and ex were just the same. So glad I watched this trial and am still in shock about how many of us are out there. Thank you for this. 😘🇬🇧

  • @danjacobsen7645 says:

    I live about 45 minutes from where this tragedy happened. Once I learned that Brooks was going to act as his own attorney I became fascinated in this case so much so that I attended the trial for 2 of the days. I just had to witness the incredible narcissism live. It was interesting to see the looks on the faces of the jury, judge, prosecutors, cops and so on. There was one time during his closing arguments that I saw jury members looking at the clock because he just wasn’t making sense. Thank you for putting this video out there I was looking forward to a psychologists viewpoint

    • @Makmurf says:

      I wondered about what the jury was doing during his rants.

    • @VictoriaMcCooey says:

      Thank you for watching! I’m not a psychologist, though. I am a narcissist divorce coach. I help people who are trying to leave a narcissistic spouse 🙂

    • @cloggy010 says:

      ooh wow that must be shocking so close

    • @gail2485 says:

      I wish I could’ve seen the faces of the jury. Obviously he cannot read emotions or he would not have believed he could vindicate himself.

    • @lifesquandered says:

      I’m gonna live vicariously though you cause it would have been fascinating to witness it in person. I’m absolutely NOT overlooking the tragedy of this case. The first ME cried while describing Jackson Sparks’ injuries. I’ve been a true crime junkie for 20+ years and I’ve never seen an ME cry on the stand. Also, the mom with the four injured children, obviously feeling like she wasn’t there to protect them because she’d left the parade early 😔, and the man whose son was pulled out of his grasp as he threw his other two children to safety (when Brooks questioned him he implied the children were injured by the dad throwing them out of the way 😡). This event was horrific, and Brooks was so narcissistic during the trial that it was like watching an pure narcissist in the wild rather than in captivity. He’s lucky he was in the clutches of the legal system, because the people of Waukesha have every right to tear him apart. Based on their decorum during the trial though, I suspect they are above that. I don’t think I would have been.

  • @ldegraaf says:

    I also found it very interesting/sad to see the cycle of abuse over and over again in the courtroom. He would have a huge blow up and say awful things towards the judge, then he would say it was her fault, but he was “sorry” she would then bring him back into the courtroom. He would then be soft spoken and act sad, followed by “normal” behavior and then another blow up. Sometimes multiple cycles would happen in the same day.

    It was really hard for me to watch this, especially when he was questioning his ex-girlfriend, who he had already abused several times. It was clear to everyone that he was enjoying having control over her again. Thankfully the judge limited the questioning as much as she could. I’m really looking forward to hearing the judge’s thoughts during sentencing and to see if any of the victims call him out on his horrible courtroom behavior.

    • @VictoriaMcCooey says:

      I found that fascinating as well. The judge did what she had to do to pre-empt a mistrial, but we don’t have to give so many second chances…. yet we do.

  • @dianalynn3453 says:

    Darrell Brooks: “I don’t consent to … Blah blah blah…”
    Why would he think anyone should get his consent for ANYTHING?! He’s on trial for murder and thinks his approval is needed. Narcissists are just hopelessly delusional!

  • @sheilakelly9116 says:

    I too watched the entire trial and kept wondering why I seemed to be triggered during it. You helped me to understand. Years ago I divorced my narcissistic lawyer-husband. Darrell Brooks reminded me of the ex husband so much that I was thrown back to that time over and over again. Thanks for helping me to put that together.

  • @cuddlebug1957 says:

    This trial was triggering and validating, so I watched a lot of it. It brought back memories of my 2 years of custody hearings (so far).

    They think they are smart, but the narcissistic traits seriously impair their judgment. Be patient, take excessive notes, listen. Make them respond in writing. They will mess up many times.

  • @autistic-lutheran-carnivore says:

    This video has really opened my eyes because I don’t know anyone in any of my circles in any period of my life that has been narcissistic. Over the past few weeks, I had been following the trial and just thought Darrell Brooks was really weird in doing these things and so I was just laughing at them. I remember his closing statement and my jaw dropped when he claimed no one was injured. I didn’t realize these were all traits of being a narcissist.

  • @claudiavalentijn1457 says:

    I saw an analysis by a psychiatrist on a law channel who said that he thought Brooks wasn’t so much a narcissist, but more of a paranoid sociopath. Which has quite some similarities with narcissism.

    • @robynfisher4455 says:

      I saw that too. Did you agree? I’m no psychologist and I definitely think there is paranoia but to me the narcissism is very strong.

    • @claudiavalentijn1457 says:

      @@robynfisher4455 I’m no psychologist either, so I wouldn’t be able to distinguish a paranoid sociopath from a narcissist, but at first I was thinking that Brooks is a narcissist as well. I didn’t really think about this paranoia element at that point.

    • @CoachCreesh says:

      I’m not a doctor; I’m a Mental Health Clinician. But, he’s as narcissistic as they come. What’s bothers me about the about what this Psychiatrist says, is the not knowing. Sadly, this doctor, Pastors, Therapists, Police Officers etc not knowing and understanding narcissism allows and empowers narcissists to further abuse others.

    • @CoachCreesh says:

      Narcissism is not clinical or diagnosable, in my personal opinion; it’s SPIRITUAL. They have all the traits of their father the devil😈 When someone has anxiety, depression etc, they can be treated. Narcissists are “IT” mask wearing clowns🤷🏾‍♀️ They’re dangerous and are nothing to play with!

      They’ll pull an argument out of thin air🤔 He argued about things he didn’t need to argue about. Narcissists put others down to try and make themselves look and feel better about themselves. He tried to make her look bad for drinking and not raising her kids yet, he’s a Registered Sex Offender on trial for multiple murders. Narcissists love to disrespect others. He disrespected the judge constantly and on purpose every chance he could. Narcissists love to exercise their power and control over others. Him questioning his ex and calling her back to the stand a second time was a display of power an control. They believe rules are created for us, not them.

  • @SalveRegina8 says:

    When Sue said, “DeFEN-DANT,” she knew what she was doing. She played him like a fiddle the whole trial and it was brilliant.

    • @MagnumDB says:

      I also agree. It was definitely said in a way to deliberately sound obnoxious. And it may have been too bait him into acting more crazy in front of the jewelry. But it might also be a message to Darrell, something along the lines of “You keep telling us what name you DON’T go by, but you aren’t saying what name you DO go by, so how about I just call you what you are right now in this trial, the defendant.“

    • @innocentnemesis3519 says:

      I wondered this. Part of me thinks she was just talking loudly, but I also wonder if she said it that way because she was trying to emphasize that if he rejects these charges because he claims he’s not Darrell Brooks, he’ll definitely react to being called the deFEN-DANT, which is a backhanded way of making him admit what he did.

      It was a subtle gotcha regardless, and she gets to maintain plausible deniability because no stable person would be that over sensitive and hypocritical about others raising their voices when all he was doing in the courtroom was screaming at everyone. 😭😂

    • @Dojacks says:

      Yes. I agree. But she came back with a helluva excuse for doing it. It was a laugh out loud moment.

    • @rebeccasamuell77 says:

      It was definitely intentional. And I loved it. I think the judge and the prosecution both got their little digs in. Just little petty stuff. It was necessary to release steam to keep from boiling over. They did a great job remaining professional.

    • @bebopkirby says:

      His behavior reminded me of all the videos we see of street felons, when approached by police. They immediately attempt to take over the investigation, the questioning, and the adjudication of whatever occurred. Basically they have nothing to loose by playing by any acceptable rules, much as the person formally know as Mr. Brooks.

  • @Delatta1961 says:

    I’m 60, and recently divorced my wife of 3 years. After months of individual counseling, it became clear she’d masked many of her narcissistic behaviors so well I dismissed those traits I did see as simple stress or misunderstandings. What made it worse was she drank every night which magnified the her temper, accusations and insults. As a catholic It was terribly difficult to end the marriage. I wanted only to make her happy, but I could do nothing right in her eyes. To top it off, I was constantly accused of being the narcissist and I was ordered by her to immediately seek mental treatment via medication. She was an RN, I’m a Commercial Pilot. I got away, and I can’t say I’m happy. I miss the few good times. I especially miss the fantasy I thought my future was going to be. Thanks for listening

    • @VictoriaMcCooey says:

      Hi Dana! I’m 62, and I feel that I have so much ahead of me in my life. It’s all in your perception. You can repair and rebuild and move on to create a wonderful new life. It’s right there waiting for you. Please reach out if I can help 🙂

    • @hellopoodles says:

      You’ve got your whole life ahead of you! And we ladies who don’t allow narcissistic behavior in our lives love a man like you who’s emotionally literate. 💜

    • @emilyduffy1410 says:

      Oh Dana! There are many of us out here looking for a kind soul like you. You’ve got many happy years ahead of you!

  • @marn6923 says:

    I too was glued to the screen during the trial because my son divorced a narcissist and when you have children with one you don’t get to walk away until your children are grown. It was fascinating to watch Brooks “cry” during his opening and closing statements. He was continually dabbing his eyes but there wasn’t a tear in sight. I finally saw tears when he was crying during the reading of the verdict. Thank you for sharing this. It spoke to my heart!

    • @VictoriaMcCooey says:

      Thank you for watching and for your comment 🙂

    • @sunamiren9063 says:

      M Am – You described what I am going through as a mother, whose daughter is married to a Narc, and have one child. She won’t leave him, until the child is an adult. That is a long time to suffer, and it is affecting her health now… there is nothing I can do. She won’t listen to me. She always pretends everything is fine… I feel very helpless, but it is her life and her decision to make. Unfortunately, the son is already showing the same signs of a Narc, at age 9… it’s really scary. I watched the whole court case, and wanted to slap that guy many times had I been there. Too distressing for me to watch as well, as I often feel like that about her husband.

      I wish we had Victoria McCooey in Australia to help. Marital sessions have not helped them as the Psycologist saw his traits right away, and she got nowhere with him.
      It’s a lost cause at the moment.

  • @gail2485 says:

    Do you remember when he questioned the witness about not reporting her injury, and he was trying to create something suspicious about her actions? The witness said the injury was not visible, i.e. it was emotional, and he was flabbergasted and stopped questioning her… But he remained looking confused at the concept of an invisible emotional injury. This man deserves his punishment

  • @clakams says:

    Traits
    1.Repeat a lie until it becomes the truth 3:01
    2.Grandiosity 5:29
    3.Entitlement 6:29
    4.Lack of Empathy 8:09
    5.Drama 9:28
    6.Word Salad 10:33

  • @robhoey says:

    As a psychologist myself, I found your take on the “alleged defendant” right on the money. Great insight, Victoria

  • @rowann26 says:

    One of the more maddening parts for me were when Brooks was trying to steal empathy from witnesses that were having a hard time on the stand and you could feel their pain….and then Brooks pretending like he needed to collect himself cuz he was so upset…. it was disgusting

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