Narcissists in CRISIS MODE
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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.
They are such special snowflakes
When narcissists start to panic, they will do anything to make you panic and destabilise your emotions. They can be unpredictable in this moment. They will do anything to get a reaction out of you. They’re often not even thinking about the consequences.
I believe they know what they’re doing. It’s hard to accept. They know what they’re doing.
If they are genuinely not thinking about the consequences, it’s because they don’t effect them, and they don’t care about how things affect others, or because then expect others to bend and fix any consequences that should fall on them.
A family narc literally broke into my house after my covert narc grandmother was upset apparently I didn’t volunteer to behave like a former scapegoat who passed away. They are terrifying because the lies they must tell to get that type of reaction genuinely begins putting you in danger from non narcissistic people around them.
The only path to proving your innocence is to create so much separation between you and the narc that they can’t even come up with a hypothetical lie that could possibly occur to stir the monkies up to attack you.
Once it’s physically impossible for you to be the source of the hyper emotional reactions because you cut contact with everyone , and the narc hammered that fact into everyone by demanding they do the same to the scapegoat for revenge, and enough time has passed where the narcs behavior of hyper reacting stays consistent, everyone has the evidence to see the misbehavior
He’s said that since I met him 8 years ago
Bro those few sentences say more than Ramani has said in her speeches, which could possibly fill up 100 books by now, and still not have the key points.
I’M RIGHT IN THE THROWS OF MY FREEDOM FROM MY NARCISSIST HUSBAND OF 33 YEARS….. THE AIR COULD NOT SMELL BETTER! I’m a sick person with a chronic illness. I was a stay at home mom and my dreams came true to have this family. But i have been shut down and a shell of myself for at least a decade. I almost divorced him at 10 years, then 20 years, then 30 years. He hasn’t had a problem in his life. And I have been blessed to be in need of GOD throughout my life. And I am thankful that I have finally made myself number one! It’s going to take years to get back to my social butterfly self- he didn’t allow me to have friends over by the last decade. I would tell someone else- it’s hard on the kids no matter what age- (mine are 27 AND 30). Do not stay ANY LONGER, HE WILL NOT CHANGE!
Seems like a lot of people with chronic illness have a narcissist spouse.
@twovirginiacats3753 Me too, 40 years now with the creep and diagnosed with chronic illness in 2015.
Stay the course onward to freedom🎉
Keep your head up, I divorced my Narc ex-husband 30 years ago. I just discovered my Mom is a covert Narc and I’m the Scapegoat, right now she will not leave me alone, she’s always abusing me and trying to control my whole life and smear my name because I’m taking my control back. She always throws a tantrum and plays the victim.
@twovirginiacats3753💯💯
What people miss is that “mask falling off” isn’t a redemption arc, it’s often a transfer of pain. Their collapse doesn’t create empathy; it demands caretaking, guilt, and mind-reading again. The tragedy is that the partner ends up managing both the grandiose ego and the deflated ego. If you’ve lived this, you’re not crazy for feeling relief and disgust at the same time. I talk a lot about these double-binds and how to protect your nervous system in my content.
Narcissists live in a fantasy world never in the real world
You look at their abusive hyper reactions and they honestly believe they can re write reality to justify that there must have been some sort of conflict that did not even occur to justify the emotion.
While the innocent scapegoat is just confused asking “what did I do?”
Followed by the narc using “dravo” going “YOU TELL ME
WHAT I DID FOR YOU TO GE MEAN TO ME!”
Leading to an endless loop where your ability to be with the family is allowing them to straight up distort reality and invent some fight between you two.
And if you emotionally react they know that’s enough evidence for most people to conclude there was a fight prior.
They become the most dangerous people in this mode, as they will try whatever possible, provoke, file in court (especially in gender biased systems), circle back, smear campaigns and so on. Cutting the relationship with them fully is the safest path, as they are in the stage of realizing the crisis they drove themselves into and trying to revenge from you for what they have done to themselves!
💯💯💯
White Lotus is basically a study in narcissism lol
Their ego collapse, loss of supply, and loss of control really shows an even darker side. They don’t miss the relationship they miss the power they had. When you begin to understand that you start healing and have no guilt about doing so.
last time Narcissists dont have any kind of ego
I have to admit the manipulation and “poor me” verbiage is horrible!! 🙄🙄🙄
Great video! Narc can’t take accountability so next phase is CRISIS!
So long as they hyper react, they can get flying monkeys to just presume the scapegoats actions were cruel despite no action taking place. That’s how the scapegoat gets abused so badly. Narcs know they don’t need an action to claim they have been wronged, just hyper reactions.
The only way you’ll ever expose this pattern is the flying monkey being placed in the position of (1) seeing what actions did take place and (2) hearing about or seeing the hyper manipulative actions from the narc based upon those actions they see.
Resilient isn’t the term. Motivated by spite, driven by selfishness, stubborn, that’s a little more accurate.
You are 100% right! My narcissistic mother in law is in her last months of her life because of cancer. She complains about the doctors how they are all new and don’t know anything, refused chemo, verbally abuses and orders her caregiver around saying that “the caregiver must do everything she’s asked because she’s getting paid”, refused the offers of her children to come and live close to them so they can take care of her, instead she blame shifts into making them think that they need to leave work and family and go and take care of her because she is their mother and she’s done so much for them when they were young. On top of that she still tries to control me and my relationships, how I should submit to her narcissistic son (whom I’m in the process of separating) and not destroy the family. I haven’t spoken to her in 3 months but the empathetic in me still doubts if I’m doing the right thing by not calling her since she’s months to live. But the thought of calling her brings me turmoil in my heart because of what I’ll hear if I call her. She’ll try to play the victim and beg me to fix the situation with her son because of the kids and family. Narcissists always use “family” as an excuse but never really truly care about family. They only care about themselves.
🏃🏃🏃🏃
No no no no resilience. At all. Not. They sit in misery snd negativity for ages.
Yes, that’s resilience. Look up the word meaning.
This is my narcissistic next door neighbour, he walked around like a peacock while unjustly lying to neighbours about my wife and I . Telling all who would listen that he’s an entrepreneur and a mentor when in reality he’s over £500000 in debt and truly unintelligent ( we hear his conversations ) He’s attempted for eight years to ruin our tranquility and get a rise out of us but he failed , we’ve 100% ignored him for five years regardless of how hard he tried. Recently he’s had to put his house up for sale due to his debts, I take no pleasure in this as I would be happy for him to do well but leave us alone as we do him . His neighbourhood life has significantly reduced as his minions have moved away one by one and he’s gone very quiet save the occasional outburst of deliberate annoyance because I suspect he’s struggling to cope with his failures and decline in his narcissistic power over others. I feel no joy at his decline but simple observation.
I’m glad you take no joy and someone else is suffering no matter how much and insufferable they are ! I have empathy for everyone even a narcissist ! I hear a lot of angry people in these comments sections sometimes so it was nice to read your comment .
My disabled father got cancer and was slowly dying. His narcissistic mother was flipping out she wasn’t being taken care of anymore because my dad was previously the one doing it. I felt like I was losing my mind.
Praise you Dr. Ramani. ❤🎉
I learned the hard way that the segment about the narcissist dealing with illness is 💯 true! they will be as rude, stubborn, irresponsible, fussy and difficult to care for as possible and then drown into their victimhood and blame you for being unloving and uncaring!
This is a great color on you, Dr R.
My narcissistic dad collapsed, and did end his life in a very dramatic way. I’m usually hesitant to tell people who don’t understand this, because I think it’s hard to comprehend if you haven’t experienced someone like this. But when life handed him consequences of how he lived, he caved in and couldn’t take it. “My way or the highway” was his motto. I fully believe him ending his life was him taking his “power” and control back.
😢😮😢😢😢 I can relate. But I dont think he was a narcissist. Yet, he was done. 😢
@AtheistQueen1I’m so sorry. It’s a terrible situation. I have no doubts mine was probably true NPD. But it still hurts.
I’m with you on this. My father had the onset of dementia. He also speeded his death up. I’m curious.. he said he didn’t want to rot away while care takers took all his money. But I question did he fear of being unmasked more. Makes me quiver.
@SherryTomlinson-r2yWouldn’t doubt it at all, honestly. Mine had been diagnosed with cirrhosis, dug himself into a financial hole gambling and whatever else, and his wife got sick and died (that he treated like garbage.) Refused to stop drinking and smoking. I think they can’t even see themselves unmasked. They have to believe that they’re in control. When life shows them they aren’t, we end up here. I’m sorry for what you experienced with yours!