Manipulative phrases that keep toxic relationships alive
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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.
Malignant narcissists are controlling Callous Cold Calculating deceptive disloyal Dishonest Most Disagreeable People dangerous. They cheat lie steal and make excellent criminals. Paranoid! In fact thereβs a personality mod called the dark triad and the dark triad is comprised of Machiavellianism, , psychopathy, narcissism, Sadism, Paranoia, Jealousy, Rage, Sociopathy, and Bullying.
Donβt Go DEEP:
π« Don’t Defend
π« Don’t Engage
π« Don’t Explain
π« Don’t Personalize
This!
Thereβs no setting boundaries with a narcissist
No boundaries only ignoring but sometimes it’s really hard π
But they expect you to respect theirs. π
Enough is never enough.
The boundaries aren’t to change their behaviors, but what you’ll tolerate.
I enforce my boundaries and they work well. I don’t emotionally react any longer. Enforcing YOUR boundaries are for you. Jefferson Fisher offers great material on this subject.
The Narci WON’T CHANGE, Dr Ramani teaches RADICAL ACCEPTANCE
Boundaries aren’t to CHANGE THE NARCISSISTS, but what you won’t tolerate!!
They work if you enforce them. Then learn RADICAL ACCEPTANCE from Dr Ramani β€
Toxic positivity happens more in narcissists relationships
Never change a narcissist
Narcissists always want us to feel bad for them
Narcissists never think of us unless they need something from us
My sister actually admitted that once. She NEVER calls me. One Saturday she called me and I said “You never call me, you must want something.” She actually admitted it.
That is for sure.. Exactly
And then, because we avoid them, they accuse us of only calling them when we want something.
Sadly true
The do it for me part makes me so angry
same… I don’t even know where that comes from either. definitely a memory gap. But was driving up this deep anger at Doc here every time she said it. I knew it wasn’t about her though but wow.
Your self-worth isn’t measured by other people’s opinions of you.
When my niece got married she planned to get married at our church. She had a list of friends and family she was inviting. My narc mother shamed and bullied her into inviting the whole church. In her opinion it was rude to have a wedding at the church and not invite the all the church members. So even though they were on a limited budget my niece ordered extra food from the caterer. There was still not enough food as there were some people that actually loaded up to go plates. The family didnβt get to eat until after pictures and there was no food for any of us. Never let someone bully you into things you donβt want to do!
Wow! Howβs your niece now?
@SundayJones-mu2ig Sheβs doing well.
The phrases that kept me trapped were “there’s always two sides in a relationship” – Well, in healthy relationships there are two sides, multiple perspectives and a willingness to understand, acknowledge and work together towards a common goal of supporting each other. In a narcissist relationship there is only THEIR side, their being right. Any friend, family member or therapist who tries to get you to be reasonable or understanding of a narcissist rather than saying “that is completely not okay, run” should be ignored.
100% unfortunately, majority of therapists are not tuned into narc behavior, then , therapy can damage the normal thinking partner
Dealing with a narc and trying to have a healthy dynamic, is impossible.
β___ is in a better placeβ aggravates me so much.
This is a sore point with me. I have said this a number of times but I think it bears repeating. I see this way. There are people sitting outside of a war zone in lounge chairs sipping ice tea. I come out beaten and bloodied and these people say “Good job, be the bigger person, now get back in there” as they sit back down and continue to sip their tea. I actually have been told “Go home and save your family” and after confiding to another that my father sexually molested me as a child her first response was “Have you forgiven him?”
Dr. Ramini, your situation examples are so relatable. I grew up in a world with these types of people.
Thank you for going into Cognitive Reframing. There is such need for trauma informed therapists.
“Do it for ME (the only person who matters)”
Please do keep your videos going, they have helped me so much over many years, and continue to do so. thank you so much. We all need these videos as narcissistics are everywhere.
It’s like it’s a moral failing to refuse to be abused
every time i feel mad at myself for being cynical, i enjoy that u r 2. love ur impersonations. i rofl. ty.
Excellent video. Been a month since my 5-year relationship ended , still trying to heal and move on, but itβs not easy.
Letting go of someone you love is hard π. After my 12-year relationship ended, I couldnβt accept losing him. With a spiritual counselorβs guidance, I finally found my way back to get my ex back.
Thatβs really inspiring. How did you find the spiritual counselor who helped you?
Father Obah Eze is a fantastic spiritual advisor with the power to win your ex back.
Additionally, Father Obah Eze has assisted my close friends, coworkers, and even family members in getting their ex back.
i just checked him online , very impressive thanks.