When You Finally See the Narcissist Clearly
What happens after you finally understand the narcissist? You might expect things to get easier once you stop blaming yourself, stop taking the bait, and start seeing the patterns clearly. But in narcissistic relationships, getting it can create a whole new kind of problem. In this video, we’ll explore why clarity may not bring peace right away—and why the narcissist may react even more strongly once you are no longer playing the old role.
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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.
The more you stay away from them, the more horrible things they say or do to you, and the more you become curious to connect the dots and save yourself, the clearer the picture would become!
Absolutely true. I’ve grey rocked to death and the obsession is still there years — decades! — later.
Spot on I fell that thing after go no contact with her like 3 years twice she tried to connect with me one or other way but now I have laser focus on pattern 😂
It is Never worth sacrificing oneself
Amen!
I’m going to have to write out something on this self sacrifice stuff .. originally created by the narcissist himself, no doubt 😢
This came at the most ironic time! Thank you!
means you are healing already 🙏
Once they know you know: you’re their enemy.
100 %
And you get told that you’re the narcissist…
…and always wlll be. Oh well. Small price to pay and I’ve survived smear campaigns and career sabotage. These people are frightening.
@zacblake9249Same here. But we have survived. Coming out of the depression and starting to look forward to what’s next in life
@zacblake9249 Yeah, I still can’t believe the vicious smear campaign she led against me. smh
Its just EXHAUSTING and who really wants to spend their life EXHAUSTED?! How does anyone really “Love” someone who does that?! 🙄
The love bombing… when it’s good it’s incredible. It takes concentrating on the bad times and forgetting the initial “love bombing” sometimes (IMO).
Amen
I once heard someone say that you can take the word “survivor” which we are, but when we see it and/or leave we can substitute survivor with “witness”. There is truth in this
“There’s no winning even when you get it.” 💯 If anything I get a more serious sense of feeling disturbed because I can clearly see what I used to be too afraid to. Like before I got it, I was sad because I thought I must be the problem. Now that I get it, I just feel sad that someone is so broken that they spent their whole lives being that way and have no intentions of changing. Interacting with a narc always leaves me feeling sad and icky.
You are correct. It is sad, all the way around.
So Brilliant. Welcome to my world! And THANK YOU for the validation. “Even with the decoder ring, these are still difficult relationships.”
It’s playing cards with someone not using the whole deck! But they pull out them cheating cards when need be. Yeah I went through that Pure hell..
I went through that two years ago and was told the reason why he did it was because when I was going through a difficult time in my life, I shouldn’t have acted that way and I shouldn’t have cried and talk to him that way when I was experiencing normal human emotions. His response was to have a four year relationship behind my back.
@Jwcounselor77 typical victim play, everything is our fault. Realistically they’re so much wasted time .. I mean there really are actual nice people in our world, you know 😢
8 years post separation only now healing and he noticed. So he smeared me and tried to get me arrested. Don’t underestimate them.
Yup!! lol shared!! Salute to you sis!!
If anxiety has become so normal that you barely notice it anymore, Clara Hartley’s anxiety quiz may help you see how much it affects your everyday decisions and reactions.
Once you get it, you can never unsee it. Manipulating you is much more difficult for the narcissist, but this doesn’t mean they’re going to stop trying.
Whenever I was depressed and insecure my sister would be the savior, telling me I’m so strong and brave and she’s the only one that was looking out for me. But the second I started getting healthy and had boundaries she’d tear me down saying I’m weak and sensitive and mentally unwell. Funny how that quickly that flips….
Its so much peaceful to understand narcissism and to feel free again. Once you decide to cut ties, life will get so beautiful
Sometimes I think the narcissist really believes their projected distortions. When they’re insistent you said something you actually didn’t say.
Projecting their control onto you. I’m thinking about someone repeating over and over that I wrote something I didn’t. I went back and even checked over the chat.
Alot are unaware
They get so mad when you can totally ignore them. Yes, they try harder to antagonize you. But trying intermittent peacekeeping with them does not work.
P.S., Dr. R rocks.
Thank you Dr Ramani
Hey. I’m just a girl from a small country called Moldova who survived growing up with a narcissist dad and now has recently ended toxic friendship. Just wanted to thank you so much for your work! Finding you was my luck. Binge watching all your videos. I’m not alone in this and it helps a lot! Thank you so much ❤