Rule #1 of every toxic relationship

One Tree Hill star Joy Lenz was trapped in a religious cult for 10 years. Please listen closely to how the cult leader “Les” robbed her of a lifelong dream. I am certain way too many of you will feel this one. I know I did!

For anyone who has experienced narcissistic abuse, this is the must know, #1 rule of every toxic relationship!

Don’t miss this powerful cautionary tale with New York Times bestselling author of “Dinner For Vampires” on the Dr. Ramani Network.

Andrew McLaurin
 

  • @Sally-ih6ls says:

    That’s horrid, idiotic narcs!!

  • @brownin329 says:

    She was misled by a predator.

  • @ekopf says:

    I just read her book. I am so excited you are interviewing her!!!!❤

  • @ENTREPRE-MOMMY says:

    Was told similar things on multiple occasions and let go of or failed at so many big opportunities because of him. I freed myself this last discard. Now I’m finally building back up. The fear is still there, but I’m finally succeeding, despite.

  • @Summer_Harvest says:

    ‘In order to stay in the relationship you have to quit yourself’
    Telling words!

  • @TracyMarieBriare says:

    Thank you I know toxic men have held me back and one even destroyed my life I’m still paying 7 years later

  • @purplediamondify says:

    This really hit home for me. It’s heartbreaking how narcissistic people sabotage your dreams under the guise of “guidance” or “what’s best for you.” I’ve faced something similar with my mother. She would scream and yell at me whenever I tried to focus on my Job or career goals. Over time, it completely broke my confidence and left me paralyzed with fear.

    Now, I experience PTSD with job interviews, and working remotely is my only viable option due to health issues. But even now, she finds ways to sabotage that too, making it seem like I’m the problem for wanting to work in a way that protects my physical health. I had started job hunting at 16, and now, at 30, I’m still at home with nothing to show for it. My ill health has made it hard to hold down steady work, and freelancing leaves me stuck with no consistent income.

    It’s so true that in toxic relationships, you’re forced to quit parts of yourself just to survive. I’m trying to rebuild, but it’s a daily struggle.

    • @DrRamani-g7i says:

      754

    • @DrRamani-g7i says:

      229

    • @DrRamani-g7i says:

      3673

    • @VictoriaSeers says:

      The thinking i question most rt now is why weren’t we taught about this? I’m 66 yrs old and just learning about it. It’s destroyed my life.

    • @artifundio1 says:

      ​@@VictoriaSeers these issues weren’t an “issue” before… My parents are highly educated people, born in que 30’s and 40’s, and they’ve never acknowledge emotional or psychological damage. Which they had. They are “hurt people hurt people”, but absolutely clueless.

      It’s hard to recognize, but we are lucky to have YouTube and Dr Ramani at this moment in time. Even if it feels like too late.

  • @TorgerVedeler says:

    Joy, I happen to love Beauty and the Beast, and now I want to see you in it. You deserve your dream.

  • @SafetyatHome says:

    So sorry you have been through such a difficult time. 😢😢

  • @critchie says:

    “You have to quit yourself”… Dr. Ramani! You are a hero. THANK YOU.

  • @gilliannae says:

    Sounds like my family where I am the black sheep and constantly given ‘choices’ yet punished for the choice and given the silent treatment. It’s very sad

  • @Fifi_Is_My_Name-O says:

    That is so sad! My heart breaks for her!

  • @tijeraslack3 says:

    This sounds like my family growing up. That’s why I went in the Army and even after I got out, I eventually moved 3 hours away and now I’m on the other side of the coast. I needed a life for me and my daughter and to be our true authentic selves.

  • @mjblazy says:

    I’m feeling this pain. This happened to me. You’re not ready ugh

  • @Matriarch57 says:

    After you “totally” quit yourself they leave you flat.

  • @metalassassin8841 says:

    Abandoning yourself…To keep that circus togheter… Until you become nothing, just an empty shell, like them…And once you’re empty they hate you, because you became what they hate most, themselves…

  • @l.b.1903 says:

    3:02 sometimes I wish people who have been in abusive relationships had met one another instead of the abuser they were with. They would probably have given to each other a better relationship based on empathy, compassion, closeness, respect, equality. Being valued and appreciated by your partner is so important. When you are with someone who is routing for you and caring it makes all the difference in the world. If I had been lucky enough to be in a relationship with a woman like that actress I would have been her number one fan sitting front row on broadway. 🎭 🎶

  • @FavourIkhina says:

    This happened to about five months ago. I already knew this was a narcissist but got to realise after years of trauma with him and was now praying for God to send me a helper because I no financial support anywhere except him. I had been praying for a job and finally one came and he said I shouldn’t disturb myself with working for people and that he’s taking care of me and could be a volunteer nurse instead of working. He said that I should relax and that he would work on getting me a work visa to the US which is where he’s based. I turned it down, only for him to say he wouldn’t support me financially anymore 😢. I still refused then he said you would have to leave my life and my house. It was tough but gave me the courage to walk away. He knew I had no friends or family to help so he threw me out of the house that very day. It was his mom who spoke to his friend to allow me till I find a place to stay. I started feeding myself and doing everything for myself that very day even though I was in his house. I made it out few weeks later and I have been healing a lot. Thank you so much dr Ramani❤

  • @Matriarch57 says:

    This brings back memories of a quote that I used to hear when I was a child. “You’re never going to amount to anything.”

  • @orielwiggins2225 says:

    Heartbreaking! This goes deep, especially when it’s your parents and that’s the home culture you’re born into. You never to constantly give up yourself to stay in any semblance of relationship with the only option for something like safety or security. It’s never a choice.

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