The real reason narcissists are acting out more than ever

Is narcissism actually on the rise—or are we just seeing more narcissistic behavior? In this video, Dr. Ramani explores how social comparison, especially through social media, may be fueling more toxic, entitled, and attention-seeking behaviors. Learn why vulnerable narcissism is becoming more visible, and how our culture may be rewarding these traits like never before. If you’ve felt like narcissists are everywhere lately, this might explain why. Don't miss this deep dive into narcissism, social media, and the psychology behind what’s really going on.

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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.

THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.

Andrew McLaurin
 

  • @NarcSurvivor says:

    The world has become highly-competitive, especially with social media. Now people are comparing themselves with others on the other side of the world. Narcissists are driven by envy and jealousy.

    • @michele0324 says:

      Comparison is the thief of joy.

    • @LindaC616 says:

      I also feel like Gen Z and young people online in comments also compete with each other as to who are the bigger victims. Gen Z likes to talk about their social anxiety and blame it all on “we saw a school shooting on TV” or 9/11, not realizing that people who are older also saw those horrors and more. It’s like they’re competing to see who has the biggest trauma.

    • @lovedbythestars9609 says:

      You always give a good resumé of what Dr. Ramani says in her videos.

    • @sandrathomas2893 says:

      Envy and Pride

    • @starsmash7491 says:

      Dr. Ramani, your recent videos sound like the audio is only in the left ear. Sorry for the hijack.

  • @pinschrunner says:

    Narcissists in America abound with the selfish individualistic culture. Wish you would speak more to those of us who do NOT choose them as partners but have one move in as a neighbor. They are more dangerous, especially when combined with sociopathy. They can ruin entire neighborhoods.

    • @summerswalkabout1515 says:

      And workplaces

    • @LindaC616 says:

      ​@@summerswalkabout1515 killed my career

    • @RM-qq5rj says:

      Yep I had a neighbor as one at the same time I had a boss and 2 coworkers as narcs for years. It was a nightmare and I certainly didn’t choose being around them and they had everyone jumping through their controlling spying hoops. It was like being trapped and couldn’t get away from them.

    • @scrambledID says:

      1000% agreed, and I hope @DoctorRamani sees this. Even in the academic literature, there is a dearth of material regarding narcissistic dynamics outside of familial and intimate partner relationships. What about the roommates? What about the neighbors? High-demand groups/cults? What about the “inner orbit” of a toxic friend’s circle? There isn’t enough pointed material for survivors of these situations as it relates to the chilling realization that you’re looking at a malignant narcissist. Those can be just as damaging, if not more. Think about the people who might already have a scarcity of/strained familial ties or decide to be single. Non-familial/intimate partner relationships can then play a much stronger role and, therefore, have a more devastating impact when you become a target of someone high in narcissistic traits. I know this from experience. There’s very little help in this area! @DoctorRamani, SAY SOMETHING!

    • @sheilagavin6536 says:

      @pinschrunner Thank you for sharing your comment. I appreciate the most excellent insight on neighborhoods. Peace

  • @pinschrunner says:

    You would have to be in denial to not see narcissistic behavior and narcissists magnified in this world

  • @autiejedi5857 says:

    It seems to be a feedback loop. More people tolerating (or praising) narc behavior encourages the development of new narcs. Round and round it goes.

  • @christinehedrick922 says:

    This video is a MUST WATCH for all, ESPECIALLY those engaging in parasocial media. Thank you Doc.

    • @alltheliliesbloomed says:

      Define ‘parasocial’.. I mean, YouTube is part of social media too and here you are engaging 😉

  • @dcikaruga says:

    They can’t actually handle stress very well, things don’t go their way, not getting what they want, and they become more wretched because of it. Even more irritable, more abusive and cruel, that’s usually how to spot when they’re even more miserble than usual. But then again, that’s just a common trait among immature people anyway.

    • @melindasmith3713 says:

      Mine quit his job blamed me , text said she changed her mind I packed car ..lol it never happened? He will take himself down with you

    • @sandrathomas2893 says:

      @@dcikaruga being a 5 year old in an adult role is tough stuff! My ex had temper tantrums at every disappointment! My toddlers were less work.
      It’s insane!!

    • @dcikaruga says:

      @ Mentally handicapped, the wrost part is all the hate and anger getting projected onto you though, more trouble than it’s worth I say.

  • @jared3622 says:

    my take? the narcissistic family model ,where one child is singled out as the emotional/physical punching bag of the family, is akin to child sacrifice. -the doomed

    • @sandrathomas2893 says:

      @@jared3622 it is child sacrifice! And that child grows up and abuses and sacrifices their child. It doesn’t come out of nowhere. It stays in the blood line by design.

    • @jared3622 says:

      @sandrathomas2893  I’d say you must know my family and extended family, but considering there are 100k fentanyl deaths per year in the US alone… I’d assume it is getting common. I saw the evil that grew in myself through life, and I denounce it now. all of my siblings and I have chosen against having children of our own without understanding why for a long time.

    • @Yoplait1277 says:

      Ouch! My past just came flooding back . A punching bag..yes! Its almost as though my family deliberately punched me down to elevate themselves…. in the name of love. Ha! I was just a punching bag!

    • @RM-qq5rj says:

      ​@@sandrathomas2893yes, it’s spiritual and demonic

    • @lindajohnson4204 says:

      Both of my parents were family scapegoats. My father, very kind, and determined to reverse the trend, with a usually mild depression. My mom, seriously depressed and always thinking maybe if she did this thing or that, they’d accept her. (Her favorite movie: _East of Eden)_

  • @michele0324 says:

    Critical thinking and self-awareness is lacking more than ever.

  • @Boyhowdy875 says:

    I remember narcissist throughout my life, decades ago, toxic narcissist. Now I know what it’s called. And now I also know that I don’t deserve their abuse and I am not a second-class citizen.

    • @Jessecraft1954 says:

      You see them today for who they are. It takes time to see their mask slip. You spot them today. They’re cookie cutter people. Stack them up and hold them to the light and they’re all the same.

    • @ladylaura93 says:

      @@Boyhowdy875 When we know, we go!! After decades of mental, emotional, physical abuse, and gaslighting…now, i know that i deserve better

  • @Sarah.blessed88 says:

    I kept falling into the same struggles, no matter how much I tried to break free. Reading Mind Decoding showed me how my subconscious was shaping my aura and the energy I attracted, it helped me to clear mental blocks and elevated my mindset, my entire presence changed- and so did my life, it felt like a fresh start. I’m just so grateful I found this book🙏🏼🌟❤️

  • @confidentsuccessfulwomen says:

    Narcissism is often misunderstood as self-love on overdrive, but in reality, it’s a paradox—because at its core, a narcissist doesn’t love themselves at all.

    • @sandrathomas2893 says:

      @@confidentsuccessfulwomen they love their image/ persona.
      They self loathe

    • @biondna7984 says:

      Exactly.

    • @flightmama3191 says:

      ❤🎉❤& they actually hate U more when you learn SELF LOVE 🎉❤🎉 HOPE UR FREE & SAFELY AWAY ❤❤❤

    • @elcee7800 says:

      And they’re the first ones to tell you to be happy in “your own skin” and then when you demonstrate that you are they call you selfish and self-centered and mount their guilt/smear campaign against you.

    • @WithAnEss says:

      💯
      Yes, self loathing- when the narc husband demonstrated an uncomfortableness with exposing his body to me, his wife – that was an awakening for me.
      Dr. Ramani’s description is spot on!

      Rather than the usual connection of women with body dysphoria, the focus needs to be directed toward men who have body dysphoria.

  • @diornotwar2356 says:

    I wish narcissists would all move to a single island. Call it “Narcissist Land” where they can all deal with each other and give each other non stop drama, which is what they crave anyway.

    • @alltheliliesbloomed says:

      I am by no means defending toxic people but Segregation: The Sequel, really? Yikes, talk about people having no filter

    • @Jae-by3hf says:

      @@alltheliliesbloomedclearly you are either the narc,enabler or flying monkey, cause anyone who has a lick of sense & experience knows exactly what this person means!

    • @alltheliliesbloomed says:

      @Jae-by3hf  Either that or you’re simply projecting 😉

  • @BeigeAdjacent says:

    Like the cool kids say: People tell on themselves. Yes, there is more narcissism than ever before, but it seems like a lot more because we now have social media to expose and promote it.

    But i would also add, as more awareness around this phenomena keeps growing (thanks to channels like this), the Narcs don’t have the same manipulative power they once did even 10 years ago … so they’re doubling down and are lashing out in fear. The Narc, as you’ve pointed out, lashes out more when enablers and tolerators edge away.

    Edit for paragraph breaks and minor spelling correction

    • @sandrathomas2893 says:

      @@BeigeAdjacent they’re just developing new skills as they are being exposed. They adapt too just as we adapted to survive them. They have much help from the demonic realm.

    • @Cranberries87 says:

      @BeigeAdjacent – I’ve dealt with TONS of narcs in my life. But my most recent experience at my relatively new job is pretty new and interesting. I’ve tangled with a narc who tried her best to launch a smear campaign against me and another person, and even made some allegations against me. She had a brief sizzle, but soon fell flat, and people saw through her efforts. She’s fooling people for a few months to a year, but eventually becomes so unhinged that people quickly figure her out and back away from her. She then seeks fresh supply in a different department and the same thing happens. A manager in a department actually told me two days ago, “Yeah, we were impressed with her at first, but she’s worn out her welcome with all of us in this department. We’re totally over her and her nonsense.” This is truly a first for me – folks quickly seeing through a narcissist’s behavior. A lot of these people say they had narc parents and are in therapy, plus there’s more information on social media, so maybe that’s why there’s increased awareness.

    • @sheilagavin6536 says:

      @Cranberries87 It’s a relief knowing others are seeing through the BS of narcissistic. Peace

  • @msbritwants says:

    We are recognizing it more. We are speaking out about our experiences more.

  • @normanbelanger729 says:

    The sad core of this is that so much of those “best lives” are curated and false, we see the surface elements of bling and pics but how many of these are staged ops, how many of those folks are underwater in debt or outright fakes? We’ve become so attracted to gilt surfaces over substance.

    • @pianoplants7884 says:

      “All that glitters is not gold.” I believe when we shine brightly from within, that’s the true worth of a person…but alas, that doesn’t uphold the systems of $ and power we’re working under now.

  • @ArtistProtagonist says:

    I can’t help but notice them more. I think it’s the red car theory. I’ve unfortunately become that person who seems to find them everywhere and looks like a person who’s casually labelling everyone. But honestly, i think i was an attractive target for these types of people and ended up being in proximity of more of them than healthy people

  • @lt827 says:

    The point about vulnerable narcissism being on the rise makes sense. I remember reading about ten years ago that passive aggressive behavior is much more common now than it was fifty years ago. Then it was not considered acceptable to say you were going to do something and then not do it. The more this behavior is considered okay, the more people will play vulnearable narcissist games.

    • @alltheliliesbloomed says:

      Vulnerable narcissism is ‘on the rise’ because some of those people learned how to engage in oppression olympics and capitalize on the perpetual victimhood being the basis of their entire identity 😉

  • @crystalcole888 says:

    I think a little bit differently on the subject. I think that narcissism is being more quickly identified than ever before. And They are starting to be called out for it. And avoided. And held responsible for it. Not legally. But more and more people are going no contact. People are educating themselves about narcissism. They’re putting up boundaries. We are all educating each other. This has never happened before to this degree in human history. Especially women. Women are educating each other about toxic men, and more and more women are either ending these relationships, or not getting into them in the first place. Which is a very very good thing. But it has created a large group of angry, entitled men who are on the spectrum of destructive narcissism.

    And I’m all for it. I’m sorry that these people don’t change, but they can’t be allowed to just continuously destroy lives. They can’t be allowed near people. And that’s what’s happening to a higher degree than ever before. Good.

  • @SevenScorpionTarot says:

    13:04 my very unqualified opinion as to why we’re seeing more narcissism is that the rates of NPD are inherently underreported due to it’s nature. Since we have more readily available educational resources like this channel that aren’t paywalled, laymen’s like us are better able to come to reasonable conclusions that we’re likely dealing with a narcissist. Knowledge is power, and sharing is caring! Thanks for all that you do 💜

  • @OnsceneDC says:

    There has also been an attack on empathy. It is seen as a weakness and exploited by narcissists. It is being done in the open, and it’s becoming normalized.

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