Ancient wisdom about healing from narcissistic relationships
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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.
There’s a proverb in the Bible: “Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain…” I think with human nature as it is, we’ll always apothesize the bold, the beautiful, the charming. At the individual level, one hopes, we can at least spread the word and hopefully, eventually, truly glorify humility and compassionate love. 🤷🏼♀️❤️
15 years ago, the woman who raised me—my biological parent— we were in a fight (I can’t remember on what) looked me in the eye and said, “You’ve been insulting me my entire life.” I recently found an old journal entry with that exact quote, and it hit me all over again. How was I insulting her, when I never even asked to be born into that family system?
Sounds like mine, who liked to tell me they wanted a boy and so on. Wouldn’t have solved any of her complaints. She just admires herself for being able to manipulate men. That’s not my fault or my problem. Looking back, she wasn’t exactly what I had in mind, either. 🤷♀️
We didn’t ask them to be our mothers.
Please read “Mothers Who Can’t Love” by Susan Forward PhD
@@mday3821 thank you. I just ordered it.
“I didn’t ask to be born” was my only defense
“Good vibes only.” types of people creeps me out. It’s like you’re not allow to talk about anger, negativity, pain, sadness, and the sick sad truths in this mess up world. They say they already know and they don’t want to be reminded, but if I encounter a man who expect women to only bring joy and only bring happiness and only positivity into his miserable life to be his fixer and up lifter then it is a huge RED FLAG!!! Be thankful those “happy only” childish men are gone. Why does societies always expect women to smile all the time and be happy all the time, as if women are not allow to have the varieties of human emotions.
Called toxic positivity. Avoid these weirdos
It’s true that women have been relied upon to hold everything together, and then given very little of the credit. I don’t feel like smiling all the time, and if some old guy tells me I should, he may get an earful as to why that is. 😂
@@cc1k435I remember my first waitress job in the dinosaur era. The boss told me to smile.. I was like wtf! And when I did it was sooo FAKE! 😂
@@SherryTomlinson-r2y I can imagine. I remember staring at such old guys and thinking, “You have got to be effing kidding.” 😂
OMG i totally get you. This type of people are the worst…
I struggled with self-blame for decades and didn’t have a name for this. I don’t hesitate to use it now.
I value your passion and authenticity!!
Thanks!
It is never too late to grow and heal. ❤️ thank you for everything you do for us 🙏🙏🙏❤️❤️❤️ God bless you ❤️
I’ve always told my kids that when we call something by its name, it takes away its power
If you can name it, you can tame it!
We name Hurricanes too. 🤔🤣
Reminds me of advice to NOT name a narcissist a narcissist….don’t unmask them, we’re told. Yet the temptation to share some of these videos so they FINALLY see what they do is strong. Exhausting and demoralizing to have your hold on reality challenged all the time.
@@GmanSJIf you show a narcissist a video like this, they will get mad and blame you. It’s not recommended.
Edit: I misread your comment a little..
The best response I’ve heard to “That’s just them” is “That doesn’t work. Either it’s bad behavior for everyone or it’s not bad behavior”
Thank you for clarity yet again Dr Ramani. Your kind of warmth, kindness and wisdom is exactly what the world needs🫂
Who would have thought that there could be anything worse than the hostility provoked by talk of narcissism? Today, the meaning of narcissism has been completely twisted and trivialised. There is a terrible mix of ‘solutions’ from people who don’t know what they are talking about.
Thank God, we have Dr Ramani. She is a lifesaver, now more than ever.
As a longtime viewer and after 25 years in the trenches, my process out description is the literal description of a phoenix rising from scorched earth 🐦🔥
Channels like Dr Ramani’s are crucial to understand how much society is being impacted by these so called super performers, successful (with no conscience, just body count), unapologetic (even when they should apologize), virtue signaling, charming (as in seductive), predators that go under the radar for so long while harming so many.
For me I’ve always understood (after years of trying to fix it) that I bonded to people who ultimately did not care about my feelings, and I’ve left situations only to repeat myself in one way or the other. But to understand my part in a relationship and why I was attracted to that kind of person was something I only started to contemplate in my senior years. It takes courage to face yourself and now I can see some of my past as necessary life lessons. Too bad I’m a slow learner!
One of the narcs in my family of origin demanded to know why I had unfriended him on social media and ceased engaging with him at all. When I gave the answer (indicating a behavior of his that had dropped a bomb into my immediate family relationships), he said “I’m still hearing about THAT?!” He has never and will never take responsibility for any of the many things he did to me over the decades. Thank you Dr. Ramani for helping me to learn how to disengage, gray rock and slowly but surely realize that I have not been crazy, too sensitive or any of that sh*t. My family and I are happier and healthier without the toxic waste around us. God bless you.
It hurts worse when it happens in childhood because you had no recourse to but to adapt to it and I didn’t ever know about narcissism until now. I’m 55yrs old. I could have been a whole different person if I had known that it wasn’t me.
Same for me. I’m 53, and am just now, in the last few months, through therapy, realizing that my mother is a narcissist 😢 she is also my next door neighbor. Going no contact has been difficult, but worth it.
Same situation my friend, but I’m 59. So much self blame and waisted time..
As someone who’s worked with/for/in Hollywood for 10 years, I’d add that the culture (by and large) supports and doesn’t “buck up against” narcissistic behavior. Amyone who does challenge the culture or these narcissistic people gets labeled as the problem
Yup. Sounds like ‘the talent’ gets a hall pass for all manner of narcissism. May it change!
All facts!
Whitney Webb, this independent journalist, expose the medias and the government.
Label me as a problem then, I make sure I AM their fucking problem first.
It really is quite stunning when the metaphorical ‘pieces of the puzzle’ suddenly fit together and one understands they’ve been in the clutches of a likely narcissist. The realization comes: there’s nothing wrong with me – there’s something wrong with *them*. Then it’s possible to have self-compassion, self-empathy, self-love. Then like a surgeon operating on a cancer, it’s possible to re-orient one’s mental defenses and life-structure to best insulate from further harm – and avoid future disease. Once you know one – other narcs are easier to spot.
Every new day is a blessing. Never take a day for granted . Its rare & special. Blessings Dr.
The book of Proverbs in the Bible has been so helpful. I believe that every verse that warns about “the fool” is warning us about the narcissist. The writings caution us to stay away from the fool and not to try to teach them because a fool refuses to learn. Some good wisdom there.
So true ❤❤❤❤❤
I’m a survivor.. I always liked my marriage to a vase. Every time he smashed it I would spend ages repairing it. Each time not all the pieces went back perfectly to and eventually it was beyond repair.