Have you witnessed “narcissistic channeling”?

Ever had that moment where someone—your kid, your sibling, a friend—suddenly feels like the narcissist you worked so hard to get away from? The look, the tone, even the phrases—they channel that same energy, and your body reacts before your mind can catch up. It’s eerie, unsettling, almost horror-movie-level stuff. This video breaks down what narcissistic channeling really is, why it happens, and why it shakes you to your core.

ORDER MY NYT BESTSELLING BOOK 📖 "IT'S NOT YOU"

JOIN MY HEALING PROGRAM

JOIN THE DR. RAMANI NETWORK

SIGN UP FOR MY MAILING LIST

GET INFO ABOUT MY UPCOMING PROGRAM FOR THERAPISTS

LISTEN TO MY PODCAST "NAVIGATING NARCISSISM"
Apple Podcasts:
Spotify:
Stitcher:
iHeart Radio:

DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.

THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.

Andrew McLaurin
 

  • @gr8t1bobo1 says:

    Even when the narcissist is no longer around, it’s like they can still haunt you from the grave.

  • @appaloosa42 says:

    Twins. O.M.G. My husband is an identical twin. His brother a flaming narcissist. Sons of a ‘smother’ for whom brother-in-law could do no wrong, hubby could do no right.
    Long story… thank you DrRamani after 53 years This is finally clear.

  • @kryssysmith1486 says:

    I didn’t catch it at first, but every time my eldest sibling yelled—at my niece or someone else—it was like hearing the woman who raised us all over again. The tone, the intensity… it felt like I never left the house we grew up in. It finally hit me: my sibling was channeling that same energy we both once ran from. We both fled as soon as we could—but now, I’m truly grateful I no longer speak to her. Being around that energy was draining. It brought me right back to a place I’ve worked so hard to heal from.

    • @sunitafisher4758 says:

      🌸 I wished you told her at that instance
      Wow you are just like mom, once she turns, continue: omg you even look like her, turn and leave her to her thoughts
      It would have shocked her to the core and enough to be a catalyst for change, hopefully a positive one ☝🏼

    • @kryssysmith1486 says:

      @@sunitafisher4758 Unfortunately, given how things unfolded with that sibling, I did mention—perhaps not in the best way—that they reminded me of the person who raised us. They didn’t take it very well.

  • @EmeliaSchiavetta says:

    Hi there
    I’m surrounded by these people , regardless, what I wanted to say is……what a nice lady you are. I listen to you when Iv no one else who understands, and you really help, so thank you x

  • @b_lumenkraft says:

    Thank you for this! A friend of mine turned out a narcissist. He always played the victim of his wife, now ex-wife. And since I found out and wanted the whole story, I contacted his ex-wife in order to get both sides of the story.
    She is just like him. The grammar, the mannerisms, the attitude,… It was uncanny AF. I wasn’t sure if I was projecting, just being weirded out, or if I’m thinking straight.
    I was seeing it objectively. Now I know. Good to know.

  • @erinward2983 says:

    Malignant-vulnerable narcissists are the scariest, most dangerous people I’ve ever dealt with. The things they’re capable of doing do cause immeasurable, lasting harm.

    • @gingerclytemnestra says:

      100%

    • @SCH292 says:

      Ever heard of the term…”Guerrilla warfare” or so? That’s how vulnerable narcissist(VN) do things. I know my mom is an VN class and know what she is capable of doing things for attention and whatever but last year she changed and UP her game. Now in the year 2025 she switched back to her older tactic(2018) but mixed with her 2024 tactic. It’s always a CATCH UP GAME with these VN class.

    • @spinnettdesigns says:

      I can totally understand this.

      I used to have horrific dreams like this bc of trying to understand why my mother hated me, even when I was little…

      Fast forward to 2002 and I remember several times, calling my 14 yr old son by my brothers name; Confusing and painful, and he’s “gone” to that side of the family as an adult. His narc family on his dads side all had the strongest effect on him (I was the hated scapegoat and truth teller)
      Hideous people, they are damaging beyond belief. I fell pray to them many times but no more.

      I heard myself (as a young newlywed) say harsh things to my (covert narc husband) and I’d say “I’m so sorry for that, that was my mother speaking, not me!” That woke me right up to find out what the heck was going on.
      Even so, it took me another 15 years before I could understand what was happening. That was will horrible tragedy’s in between. On sister died of cancer at 22, and another was murdered at 39, and other dreadful things…

      I believe in nurture more than nature (genes) bc of my life experience. I broke the pattern and became hated. My ENTIRE family system has these traits, along with flying monkeys. I’m finally out.

      Gosh, immense confusion and “training” to recognize and reject, unless you want to become like them ,or shrivel and die.

      No more family connections for me, because the family have rejected me and what favor they did me by their actions.
      I thank God for my couple of real friends in my Christian congregation who are not perfect, but whom I can trust.

      I love that you didn’t let us “off the hook” but helping us to look inward, most of all, taking accountability.
      Self reflection is the only way to health in every way.

      Thank you again Dr Ramini. ❤

    • @PaulMansmann says:

      Yes, the absolute worst. The viciousness of their smear campaigns to destroy your reputation is unimaginable unless you’ve experienced it firsthand. It’s almost unbelievable that someone you have poured so much love and effort into would turn around and intentionally do so much harm because you’ve taken away an entitlement or reclaimed some sense of self.

    • @erinward2983 says:

      @@PaulMansmann I understand.

  • @tims9434 says:

    Don’t forget why you went no contact ever. Remind yourself why if you have doubts. Understand how you’re not like them.

  • @MaryWallace-wv2bn says:

    Omg!
    My narcissistic sister who basically raised me came through her son in the same way!
    Evil… eyes and voice.

  • @AtosaR says:

    My sister has turned into a female version of our narcissistic father, although not necessarily in an eerie way, but it’s still disconcerting to see her talk and react to situations just like him. I avoid both of them as much as I can.

  • @Meekismwisdom says:

    This went in a whole different way than what I thought channeling meant . Some people may see abuse as power and they will mimic the narcissist and they become the narc . If the grandparents of the family was a narcissist then most of the family will be . Behavior is learned and adopted forsure .

    • @Marcie-w1u says:

      That’s what I assumed! I find myself acting that way around my narc family as a defense.

    • @kharper506 says:

      I hear you my mind went into mental gymnastics because of the way I reminded the echo chamber of narcissists of my dad. And they dumped off all their projections onto me. They stole from me and cut me out of inheritance and I made my own way only for them to flip scripts.
      After he died I became the scape goat – I was used as a punching bag by so many of them but it was done on the down low – I took care of myself and others – if I knew then what I know now – it was a moment in time they created a perfect storm but knowing what I know now I also know how relentless the false persona can be.
      It is a head trip dealing with trying to escape them and keep your children safely away from them or safe and not becoming like them

    • @AnnePerkins-po5jo says:

      ​@@Marcie-w1u This is so much a part of the narc system and how it perpetuates. I work hard to try to not be a channel but find other chanellers difficult to deal with. They have normalised the narc behaviours.

    • @NiinaParhaniemi says:

      @@Meekismwisdom that’s right, and I am sorry to say, that there are lot of those traits in My family, on mother’s side but also elsewhere.

    • @xjjfjfdjdh9993bbhhhh5hjjjjd says:

      ​@@Marcie-w1uWhen I became aware of it, I tried to forge ahead to avoid doing it ever again. “Thankfully”, I wasn’t the target, but the targeter to redirect. Now, I take it on myself (no redirection) with authenticity, and if they can’t deal with me, then too bad for them. It’s not easy, because you have to be hypervigilent, but it’s kind of like a “mask” that happens to be your real face. I noticed some people made fun of others, but ONE person didn’t. I realized my actions were in muscle memory, but if I stayed aware, I could avoid following the flow and just sit without comment like the other person.

  • @JohnBarrylizard says:

    Yes. My half-brother does what our dad used to do so I have nothing to do with him. He doesn’t see it. He went from being put in a mental institution from dad’s abuse to hating dad to being bought off and making excuses for dad to now trying to become like our dad and he doesn’t see it.

    • @xjjfjfdjdh9993bbhhhh5hjjjjd says:

      Sometimes I think, the person subconsciously misses them, or the other person used to say things first, so they didn’t have to say it. Now that the original person is not there anymore, the person subconsciously takes on the role to fill the gap to “get the thing said” or to make it seem like the person is there.

  • @lesliejoyce1944 says:

    So true! This is why I keep asking about healthy ways to interact. My parental scripts are so gross.

    • @user-wi9hv2pb2q says:

      one if my neighbors said something kind and supportive to me last week, and it made me sad I have Never heard anything like that from my family.

    • @genevalawrence801 says:

      ((HUG)) I’ve fought with this one, too. I’ve decided that if the phrase came out of my mother’s mouth, especially at high volume, then I should never allow it to come out of mine.

  • @Unicdtt says:

    Spiritual Warfare is what’s you acquire from unhealed parents. That project their narcissistic behaviors and coping mechanisms onto their children. You become what you’re conditioned to be when you are a child with no voice. Reprogramming your subconscious and healing your tormented soul is the path to letting go of the past. An living your best life as an adult with free will. We didn’t have free will as a child but we do today. Healing the inner child and learning what you weren’t conditioned to believe is the beginning to the end of your internal suffering.

  • @angiep8605 says:

    My young neices came out with comments one day that I know must have come from my sister discussing and saying things in front of them. It was a light bulb moment about my sister and her husband. I felt bullied by the comments and so sorry for my neices, as I’m not sure they realised they had been triangulated by my sister. It’s scary.

  • @gingerclytemnestra says:

    Yes, my ex and his sister are clones of their narcissistic mother and it is chilling.

  • @suzannejensen8218 says:

    It’s amazing that I ran across this as it happened to me with my sister at a lunch get together. After 7 or so yrs of not having any
    contact there was a lunch with myself and two sisters. My one sister channeled our father who was passed away for 15 yrs.
    it was so real that i was creeped out but never told anyone about it. Same voice, attitude & actual same words and gestures
    as our father. I knew then that there was no way I would ever go back to any interaction with her.. She’s crazy as far as I am
    concerned. It was like the main character in the movie “PSYCHO” But only… real. So glad I saw the video. Thanks!

  • @m.i.n.d.y says:

    While I can’t say I subscribe to beliefs about channeling, I have experienced the spiritual side of narcissism. There can be a darkness that they invite in and carry with them. Their homes can be very spiritually dark places. I thank God for opening my eyes and helping me leave. I didn’t realize how dark my home was until God brought light into my situation and I got to experience being away from the narcissist.

  • @Dawnsbookreviews says:

    Thank you for this video.
    Fascinating topic.
    It reminds me of the concept of “family systems” therapy where a therapist asks the patient: “who is talking right now?” when they notice the tone and mannerisms shifting.
    Then, when the patient replies:” Well, I guess I sound just like my dad”, the therapist will say “Let’s respectfully ask your dad to step aside for a minute”.
    This helps a patient access their true self.
    I am very intrigued by this idea- read about it in The Body keeps the score.

  • @b8akaratn19 says:

    Once my child, who as a teenager is twice my size, tried blocking me from leaving my own bedroom during a disagreement which became an argument… I was shocked, terrified, and in horror said, “Only your father has ever done this to me before…” 😮 Started doing blessings all over the house and on him when he was sleeping … cuz narcs are demons 😅 ✝️🙏💙❣️

  • @jonesselas says:

    Amazing video. I wake up hoping it was just a bad dream but it’s reality, my girlfriend has left me. No matter how much I tell myself to move forward, my heart refuses to let go. I just want to turn back time and hold onto her one more time

  • >