How do you STOP a narcissist from DESTROYING your peace?
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People hate the words “radical acceptance” simply because we don’t want to accept it until we accept it. If you’re still tabtruming about hearing “radical acceptance” then you’re still attuned to their dysfunctional system.
Thank you, I like this Radical Awareness. It is literally life saving.
When she mentioned “mean to you right before a special events”.. honestly 😢like honestly 😢😢
I prefer that term radical awareness ❤ great insight as always
I am going to make it. 💪
I just know I have to.
It’s true, they’re people who steal your peace and quiet. They’re always scheming something. It’s exhausting. To me my peace and my space are fundamental.
“They are always scheming something” – so true
One of the biggest things about our culture is letting behavior slide because we tend to think the behavior is benign. Or we make excuses for the behavior, which, my biggest pet peeve saying is “oh that’s just the way they are.” Many people enable this type of behavior because they are momentarily getting benefits from the behavior or from the person exhibiting the behavior.
I loved that you mention that many people don’t want to rock the boat and the status quo. Many people put up with all types of behavior to get what they want. Which as a victim of this abuse can leave you isolated or people watching you suffer, but don’t want to say anything because they are getting benefits from the abuser.
Radical awareness and acceptance is accepting that this might be the case for you, and to find safe and healthy support systems that can support you. This is why I always advocate for people to seek therapy. It’s a safe container for you without the interpersonal social dynamics of unsupportive family and/or friends.
Whether they are or not it’s not working. My peace is priceless.
this is gold for narcissistic abuse recovery. Wish someone taught me these strategies decades ago, it would have saved me so much grief!! Thank you, dr Ramani, you are a star!!
I never knew what peace was until I divorced my ex and went no contact with my family. It is highly underrated, and I won’t live without it.
If only people could appreciate how delicately subtle but genius this is-radical awareness. Thanks 🙏🏻
Your train story and when they show up nice and I’m always on guard. Yesssss I feel confused and terrible after bc it’s like oh ya maybe they finally see the light. Then the other side of it is hell no they aren’t
Thank you as always. Really helped a lotttt
34:20 The intrusiveness while being neglectful is spot on 💀
I HATE IT
I agree. Radical acceptance is about accepting reality as it is. Not liking it. And reality as it is, is that there are bad people in the world who you need to stay away from. Always have been; always will be.
Near the 27:44 mark…The first thought that came to my mind when you were talking about them showing up to help when you were unable to accept it…. was that it was a planned attempt to string you along, where they knew you would HAVE to say no to the connection/ event to keep that foot in the door, that hope alive. I’ve experienced it and fallen for it time and time again. I’ve termed it “Weaponized Hope”, a label which helps me recognize and begrudgingly “Radically Accept” the behavior, the feigned effort, and the lackluster “care” they regularly give. That’s just me, I’m only an ADHD empathic observer recognizing patterns I see in my own life as I sit back, preserve my emotional sobriety, eating gummy bears. Thank you for sharing this life-saving information. You are a part of my journey through many Ah-ha moments in this new, healthier chapter of my life. Thank you.
After moving away for now 1 year… I can literally sleep happily. Yes, awareness is making me safe, better.
Thank you, dr Ramani.
You are a treasure. Thank you for all of these practical tools.
I’m the villain while he acts like a saint. Betraying, lying, gaslighting, verbal abuse. I took full accountability for any mistakes I made and he just doesn’t stop trying to drive the guilt into me. I officially gave up 2 days ago, officially. They don’t have empathy. They just want control. The worst human being I’ve ever encountered in my LIFE.