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Andrew McLaurin
It’s very thoughtful and compassionate of you to want to warn the narcissist’s new partner. But it is a waste of time and energy. They’re not going to listen. They’re going to think the narcissist is a wonderful person, just as you did when you first met them. We were under their spell. We overlooked the red flags and ignored anything that their ex may have said to us. The same thing is likely to happen to the narcissist’s new partner.
Right after you posted your comment you give yourself a like, you have no shame.
Do you work with Dr Ramani?
You are a narcissist 😂😂 trying to play
@@Spartan7646 she is a narcissist, herself.
@@jilladams7573 Not one bit
You get labeled as the “jealous/petty ex” then the new supply walks around all smug and thinking they got a prize. Little do they realize it’s a “booby prize”
Then you not only gave the narcissist supply, because you’re reacting to them getting with someone new, but you’re just driving their new partner closer to the narc. Let them find out. I know your intentions are good. But it will go nowhere until the narc drops their mask. The fresh new love phase can’t be stopped.
I went through this with a friend who dated my ex. I even vented to her about the crap he pulled, but he was going to do better for her. Much to the surprise of no one – he didn’t.
Why other women think he’ll be different with them is beyond me! He’ll be the same whether it’s NPD or not!
This is what I went through when I warn someone about my toxic ex-boyfriend.
Six months later she was calling me and crying on my shoulder about him. I gave her gentle sympathy. Then she stopped calling. He had Hoovered her back into the relationship. For awhile anyway.
“Trust your gut.” Is supportive & doesn’t throw anyone under the bus.
True true
trol
Nobody can teach anyone about these people unless they themselves experience firsthand. We’d look like stupid people.
After the experience of a narcissistic relationship, it is the enablers and flying monkeys who now “look” stupid.
Their ignorance is bliss for the narc.
@@WithAnEsshello how can i go in another country?Without money?I am in the SAME situation.
After I left my ex, his stepmom told me that he had been twice -diagnosed as a sociopath. I had to ask what that was as it was the early 80’s. I asked her why she didn’t tell me earlier and she said “bc we thought he really loved you and would change. Besides, would you have believed us”?
I’ve seen this in my family, friends, and friends spouses. I stopped trying to make them see. They will learn it the hard way. Maybe when the children are born. Could I persist? Yes. Will I be listened to? No. I see no point in trying to help them see how bad a person is, especially if I have noticed they listen to their narcissist more in every aspect of their life. I will always be a villain in these types of scenarios and narcissists will ask the supply (my friends, and family )to cut all ties.
I once warned one of my dad’s past wives and girlfriends that he’s narcissistic. She was of course offended. YEARS later I got a written apology from her in the mail. It was torn up and taped back together with a hand written sidebar note that he tore up the letter, beat her, and she sent it anyway. I stopped warning his victims after that because it didn’t help and only made things worse.
You’ve just posted the video I’ve been waiting years for, Dr. Ramini. When I heard you say that, “With an adult narcissistic child, you can never win,” I felt euphoric that someone finally understands what I’ve experienced for 40 years. Thank you from the depths of my soul for this one. I’ve liked, saved and shared.
As a person whose whole family has triangulated just about every other extended family I still find myself wanting to reach out to people I think might be open to some honesty. Then I rethink it and realize it’s false hope. It’s very lonely being the outlier…the one who sees the dysfunctional behavior.
BEST Comment ever.
I had to watch my brother abuse his wife for years before she ever got ready to get out. My parents not only gaslit themselves, but her also. She had to attempt to get out more than once before she was finally done with it. I was there to help her in her first attempt, but when she went back, I of course was found out. Her second attempt did I know of was her successful escape, She got away from him and I haven’t seen or heard from her since. I hope she’s doing well
Thankyou DR.Ramani, i just get divorced yesterday, but fortunately i start to educating my self enough long before this happened, i choose sanity, Now im on the final discarded . Wish me luck guys !!!!
Wishing you all the best in your recovery.
@ thankyouu 🙇🏻♂️
Good for you for choosing sanity and educating yourself! The final discard is tough, but it’s also the start of real freedom. Wishing you strength and healing. you’ve got this!
@ yes it is, ofc i missed her, ofc i recalling the good days .. but i do remember there’s no “relationship” in a 1st place ..
thankyou guys 🙏🏻🙏🏻
Warning is futile unfortunately the victim must experience for themselves the toxic behavior to actually get it!!
In her song “vampire” about surviving a narcissistic relationship, Olivia Rodrigo sings, “And every girl I ever talked to told me you were bad, bad news. You called them crazy; God, I hate the way I called them crazy too.” The narcissist has most likely already begun telling stories of his “crazy ex” to their new girlfriend, and she’s nodding her head as she sits curled up on his couch with a glass of wine in her hand, thinking she’s going to be so great at this relationship that he will NEVER break up with her and say all this to the next one about HER. She’s touching his arm and agreeing with his story, saying, “Oh, that’s terrible! I hope she gets the help she needs…but regardless, I’m glad you’re free of all that. You can’t fix people, you know?” And he will agree and say he’s happy she’s “not like the others” before he kisses her, and she is thinking she’s the luckiest girl in the world.
Flash forward a year later and she’s crying on the phone in the bathroom to her sister because nothing she does or says is ever right, and she’s freaking out because he’s raging in the bedroom and throwing things because she had the audacity to ask him who the girl was next to him in that Instagram story.
🤦🏼♀️😔😣
Well, you are 100% spot on with this story ……100%……🎯
People only see what they want to see in the NARRICEST.they are two different people . what you see in public isn’t who they are . people don’t see how they are behind closed doors .I know because I lived it
I warned her, but she didn’t believed me, until he put his hands on her… She still decided to be with him… He talked a lot of mess about me to her, until she saw that he was lying about it…. She didn’t took my husband, she took my problem
Minding your own business never goes out of style.
I tried to warn my now son-in-law. Flash forward 7 years……he has his eyes open. But what I didn’t know at the time…..he is 100 times worse than my daughter. Oh, well. Peas in a pod.
As much as I wish I’d been warned about my narcissistic ex bf, I don’t know if I would’ve believed it because he was a master manipulator. I believed he was such a prize until I found out who he really was.
My ex went thru new partners like toilet paper. For a decade, I was a person non grada in our small town. Just one year after our divorce, I received a phone call from his girlfriend asking if he was ever abusive to me. I responded truthfully. Every 6 to 10 months, I received calls from his new partners. I never sought them out, never addressed them in public, yet I’ve received similar calls from 11 of his partners. I advise not warning anyone. Imo, they must learn on their own.
This is so great to know, thank you for commenting this! My ex narc has a new partner and it’s been wearing on me and I’ve been contemplating trying to save her in any capacity. Now, I will let it go and move on. 💖🙏💖
@mollykayramstack6193 It took me 18 yrs to leave. I’m a slow learner. Today, I love the awesome person I’ve become. Maybe the new partners will learn quickly or have to experience the abuse to become a strong individual. I incubated chicken eggs as a child. I learned I couldn’t help the chicks during their hatching progress. The struggle was necessary to develop leg muscles. I only helped one and the chick was crippled. His women are on their own journey. It took alot not to be perpetual caretaker I’d learned to be during the entire marriage. I wish you well on your journey to resilience
I was with a horribly abusive sociopath for three years. And a drug addict (opiates). His parents never warned me, knew all about it. I was almost killed, then stalked for four years.
I wish they had warned me.
But after I kicked him out I learned of a woman he was seeing and did try to warn her to protect her. She just thought I was a crazy ex (I’m sure that’s what he told her).