Radical Acceptance: There Is No Pain-Free Path with a Narcissist

Once you realize you’re dealing with a narcissist, it can feel like you’re standing at a crossroads. Should you stay? Leave? Say something differently? Handle it better? Radical acceptance means confronting the hardest truth of all: there is no pain-free path — only the choice that aligns most with who you are and what you value.

ORDER MY NYT BESTSELLING BOOK 📖 "IT'S NOT YOU"

JOIN MY HEALING PROGRAM

JOIN THE DR. RAMANI NETWORK

VISIT MY WEBSITE

RECOMMENDED RESOURCES AND HOTLINES

LISTEN TO MY PODCAST "NAVIGATING NARCISSISM"
Apple Podcasts:
Spotify:
Stitcher:
iHeart Radio:

DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.

THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.

Andrew McLaurin
 

  • @zmesopotamia6792 says:

    It’s a battle to cut the losses.

    • @kenanglemire8328 says:

      Listening to Dr Ramani and others (Jill Wise and Jefferson Fisher) daily allowed me to learn how to cut those losses with minimal harm to me and those I Love!

      IT WORKS IF YOU WORK IT!!❤

      I’m on month 9 getting to the other side of the DISCARD after 35yrs of marriage to a Vulnerable Narci wife!

      I promise you that even though all our choices suck, we MUST choose the least sucky choice and MOVE forward! Repetition is your friend! Progress not perfection 🎉

    • @kenanglemire8328 says:

      Please KNOW, I empathize with your pain and I’m sending you a hug.

      It fu**ing sucks…but it sucks less when you get to SURVIVOR MOUNTAIN!

      I’LL SEE YOU AT THE TOP ❤

  • @kkryz says:

    I think I need to watch your video about narcissists and violence again.

  • @Haldangi says:

    He still invades my heart like a thief even after broke up with him 6 month ago, but I choose to accept the reality both the great and the terrible parts of him were real.
    I’ve come to accept that this terrable wound is permanent hurt, and by truly accepting that, I will find the strength to live my life to the fullest.
    Thank you Dr.Ramani love from Japan.

    • @kenanglemire8328 says:

      Do you secure your home from the thieves in the night?
      Secure your Heart!
      Peace Be With You on your journey!

    • @Haldangi says:

      @kenanglemire8328 Thank you for your warm words. I’ve realized that I can’t perfectly lock all the doors to the past.
      The bike shed he fixed in the scorching summer, his warm bear-like smile and loud laugh, the bedroom where he belittled me as ‘suffocating’
      when I caught him cheating, and the living room where he screamed “you are insane!!”…The streets, the shops, the people, the music etc…
      I’ve decided to accept every bit of it and PAIN to be live forword.

      Thank you very much, it was very very nice of you.♥

    • @lorianttila9698 says:

      ​@kenanglemire8328brilliant

    • @kenanglemire8328 says:

      ​@HaldangiI won’t judge others personal choices or reasons, but know it’s not you!
      I did the same for 35yrs with a Vulnerable Narci wife of 35yrs and now I’m being discarded! I would of been better off if I acted on the red flags earlier but here I am…PBWY 🕊

    • @Haldangi says:

      @kenanglemire8328 Thank you, and I understand that you are not judging me ^^
      I acknowledge that the various terrible abuses he inflicted were not my fault, but I also recognize and accept that his wonderful qualities were also genuine,
      and I intend to enrich my life going forward, carrying that pain with me.

      35 years is a long time… As Dr. Ramani suggests, I hope you will thoroughly pursue the DEEP process, establish boundaries in your heart,
      and proceed with legal preparations without her noticing, so that you can live a happier life in the future. Thank you again.

  • @RiseAboveIt92 says:

    Something I’ve discovered about escaping narcissistic abuse, is that the recovery gets complicated. So many other issues come into play, that escape and healing from narcissistic abuse just becomes very complicated.

    • @kenanglemire8328 says:

      Complicated yes, BUT discovering YOU isn’t impossible! ❤

    • @beverlyadams7205 says:

      I felt this way early on, but after years of watching Dr. Ramani ‘s tapes and following her gentle suggestions, my situation with my abusers became clearer and clearer. I’m so happy that I stuck with it. I met a peaceful place. I never thought was possible. I’m 77 years old and the last four years are the first years of peace I’ve had in my life.

    • @kenanglemire8328 says:

      ​@beverlyadams7205I LOVE it Beverly! I admire your Beauty and Strength that radiates from your words!
      I will SEE YOU AT THE TOP OF SURVIVOR MOUNTAIN! The view is like you describe 😊

  • @RiseAboveIt92 says:

    Yes I had stalking too

  • @RiseAboveIt92 says:

    Good comments, and one of the most important things I’ve done is to learn who I am for myself.

    But it’s not easy. Even when you cut contact and try to start over

  • @kenanglemire8328 says:

    Mornin Glory Survivors ❤ I’m an example that if you apply what Dr. Ramani teaches, you will be on the path of writing YOUR SCRIPT for LIVING!!
    We’re living our parent’s script, our spouse’s script, society’s script, and on and on!
    HIT THE BRAKES AND FIND YOU FIRST!

    I share this @65yrs old today on my BDay after an abusive childhood and discard after 35yrs of marriage to a Vulnerable Narci wife!
    What sucks is how hard wired I am/was to not realize it’s not the GENUINE ME participating in a script I didn’t write but felt compelled to live…

    I now have a therapist helping me write MY SCRIPT and along with Dr Ramani’s teachings and the other wonderful content creators (Jill Wise and Jefferson Fisher), I’m discovering ME and am terribly excited for my future and the relationship with Life!

    IT WORKS IF YOU WORK IT….

    Peace Be With You all on your journey to SURVIVOR MOUNTAIN!

    SEE YOU AT THE TOP, THE VIEW IS AMAZING 🎉❤

    • @HotFlush-O-Clock says:

      Happy birthday friend. I wish you well with YOUR script…for what YOU have already written and the WONDROUS joys I wish you for your unwritten future.

    • @kenanglemire8328 says:

      ​@HotFlush-O-ClockThank you 😊 please give that beautiful pupper dog in the picture a hug for me and I can’t wait to see you at the top of SURVIVOR MOUNTAIN 🎉🙌🎉

    • @poppyalameda9968 says:

      Congratulations on freedom. Regardless of the age, it is a wondrous thing to find clarity about these issues, to “pierce the veil”, and realize that the behavior of others, is not our responsibility and that we can’t “fix” anyone but ourselves. For survivors of abuse, including narcissistic abuse, it’s a liberation to know that we: didn’t cause it, don’t own it, can’t fix it, and it’s not our responsibility. This is a blessing to learn. It can bring immense psychological and physical relief to know that. Wishing you greater peace and serenity on your path of healing.

    • @Desiree-u7g says:

      Happy birthday!!! Great job writing you’re OWN script. You’re so right. It’s been a staying struggle bring there for ungrateful mean abusive people who are/were close to us.
      You’re amazing

    • @beverlyadams7205 says:

      I’m with you 100%.❤

  • @marysisak2359 says:

    Narcissists are the master of the game and the game is rigged.

    • @kenanglemire8328 says:

      Mary, it’s a Carnival Game that you can’t win so don’t play!
      Imagine walking by all the Carnival Games. As you walk by the games with the allure of the big stuffed animal you walk by because you won’t waste your money on a rigged game!

      Don’t waste your self worth and Soul on a rigged game fighting a Narci..

      I hope that helps. Peace Be With You on your journey to SURVIVOR MOUNTAIN where the prizes are better than a damned stuffed animal 😂

    • @saumyatewari8629 says:

      It is a game you win when you don’t play!

    • @kenanglemire8328 says:

      ​@saumyatewari8629CHEEHOO, you get it fellow Survivor 🎉 it’s amusing to watch them squirm when you don’t play because you’re in CONTROL 😂

    • @TesseractDome says:

      @kenanglemire8328 So much better than that big stuffed animal.

    • @kenanglemire8328 says:

      ​@TesseractDomeEeeexactly! 🙌

  • @kenanglemire8328 says:

    I hurt for ALL OF YOU going through this process, BUT I’m also excited for you all after RADICAL ACCEPTANCE and the exciting lives you will discover.

    The world needs your Beautiful Soul and I hope you’ll become the best version of yourselves and enjoy that reward, Y O U..

    Peace Be With You all on your journey to SURVIVOR MOUNTAIN

    SEE YOU AT THE TOP 🎉❤

  • @mariehughey5390 says:

    They love bomb in public and devalue in private. Everyone looking will love the narcissist and wonder what your problem is. The thing that set me free is: trusting myself (after years of journaling), lovingly re-parenting myself, and then turning my empathy and understanding toward myself first. Self respect. First. Then allow a few other people in.

    • @susanmercurio1060 says:

      That’s called “street angel and house devil.”

    • @fivethingsyoushouldknowabo9544 says:

      Me too. After years of thinking I was doing something wrong it finally clicked. It’s not me. It’s him. Although I will have to say if I tell him what I need very often he will change his behavior

  • @kenanglemire8328 says:

    My Mornin Ramani Harmony! 🥳

  • @kenanglemire8328 says:

    ❤BELOVED, “IT WORKS IF YOU WORK IT “!
    SEE YOU AT THE TOP OF SURVIVOR MOUNTAIN 🎉

  • @edycrowley2878 says:

    I took the “all alone in the world path.” Yes, a few friends, but very little family connection. I do have peace, though.

    • @beverlyadams7205 says:

      In my opinion, the peace is way more priceless than the connection with my abusive family ever was

    • @earthrooster1969 says:

      Perhaps like many of us in this community. Because those who are in the thick of things are often playing into each other’s insecurity and power structures

    • @TesseractDome says:

      That beautiful peace is unparalleled and so healing for the body, mind and soul.

  • @kenanglemire8328 says:

    Narcis don’t have INTIMATE relationships in and out of the bedroom!!

  • @neptunelove8534 says:

    Thank you Dr Ramani, there is no pain free path is the truth.

  • @kenanglemire8328 says:

    This thread is full of BEAUTIFUL SOULS with wonderful comments!
    Share this Beauty with the World, we need all of you! ❤🎉❤

  • @beverlyadams7205 says:

    I’ve been out of the narcissistic relationship with both my daughters for 3 to 4 years now. Initially, the pain was unbelievable, mingled with the elation of no longer being verbally abused. What I can say to people contemplating walking away from abusive families is that now, when the pain hits me, I let it wash through me have a good cry, be kind to myself and move on. I am 77 years old and my daughters are in their 50s. I’ve been in abusive relationships my entire life. The last few years have been spent learning who I am and feeling myself for the very first time.❤

    • @fivethingsyoushouldknowabo9544 says:

      So sad. They probably became narcissistic from being raised in an abusive home. Unfortunately I also stayed in an abusive marriage and now my adult daughter is a narcissist too. I guess it’s a way of protecting herself from any more harm. We are not speaking either. Lord please heal our daughters❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹🙏🙏

  • @M127-j8l says:

    I think it was Haruki Murakami who wrote: pain is inevitable but suffering is optional. It seems applicable here.

  • @moniquejackson7741 says:

    Brilliance from TWO source. Thank you for putting words to my intuition.. “There is no pain-free way.” Even if you go no contact, there is still pain. “Avoiding pain inhibits growth.”

  • @IzabelaWaniek-i1x says:

    That’s so true. There’s no escape from pain if you are dealing with narcissistic people.

  • >