The HARSH REALITY of having a narcissistic CHILD
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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.
Having a narcissistic child can be very challenging. It may bring up feelings of guilt and cause you to blame yourself. It may make you want to fix everything for them, which causes you to become their enabler. But then if you avoid them, you may feel guilty or as though you’re not being a good parent. They will also blame you and make you feel bad for them. So it’s like whatever you do, you can’t win with them.
And then we are to go no contact with a narc In every other video if it was a partner? Is it the same here?
Very challenging
I did for four years. She got humbled. Not sure if that’s going to last. Luckily, she’s a thousand miles away and we have limited contact. For now. I may go back to no contact.
@@seameology sometimes that’s the best decision, but that doesn’t make it easy!
Wow! It’s as tho you were living invisible in my house when my son was growing up. I’m reading these for the first time ever, and feel like my eyes are open for the 1st time in my adult life. I am in shock. Thanks for sharing this.
I needed to see this video!!!!! I have been so depressed over this very issue!!!!
Me too, some days are better than others.
@@k.popper2620my daughter is 31 and has financially and psychologically abused me for YEARS!!! I have been on leave from work due to a mental breakdown….. I can’t get out of the bed most days… I’m not caring for myself as I should…. I have not slept in 2 full days…. I have to let go… it’s draining the life out of me 😢😢😢
Praying for you, Dr. Ramani, for your safety, wellbeing, and protection during these awful times of wind, and fires in/around the LA area❤😮
I was thinking about her when I saw the news. I hope she can share how she’s doing when she can.
❤🙏🙌🤲
Wow, you described my entire relationship with my adult child. I have very conflicting emotions.
It’s absolutely brutal
My son is a cop & a malignant narc..a liar!! His charm & good-looks fool many & most .. his 3 sons are kept for just his in law family not for his dad or myself. 😢
Grief is ongoing.
Radical acceptance helps me ❤
Ty, Dear Dr. R.. 😘
HOPE YOU’RE SAFE TOO.
Thank you for sharing such a raw and honest perspective on this challenging topic. Many people might feel isolated in their experience, but this video surely helps them realize they are not alone. I hope you continue to create such valuable content!
Perfectly stated. YES!!!
Yes. This is my case. I went through all these situations. Thank you for validating my feelings and that’s we mothers have to bear it.
My 2 adult sons are wildly mean spirited, and yes, VERY NARCISISSITIC. I did my best to raise them with compassion and great empathy.. they definitely were not paying attention and followed their very toxic abusive father whom I divorced in efforts of protecting my sons from him. The hardest part was trying to find a decent man(father & husband) to guide them in the right direction. Unbeknownst that I attracted narcisissits as my father was…radical acceptance they are who they are. I miss them but am safest away from them as adults. Theyre just as verbally abusive as their dad was. What their dad did to them was not my responsibility. Thats on him and they need to realize that. I loved them and all this broke my heart deeply. 💔
I am so sorry you experienced this. I experienced this with my nephews that I helped raised who have narcissistic parents, similar to my parents in ways. I have had to come to radical acceptance, grieve, and distance myself from all of them to protect my health. It is very difficult to do. Thank you for sharing. ❤
It makes you lonely, devorced and than taking distance from the children. There is no creative bond with them, and if grandchildren were there your not a part of there live. You get lonely , ad least i am. finding a reason to live without them for your self. You had a creative live with husband and children and endsup alone with empty hands and all your creativity that you put in the children is lost , has no fruits. And than you have to find a new reason to live for, when you lost everything you put so much love in. Its like grieving and fill the emptyness again with somthing worthy. Much love from a single lonely mom in The Netherlands. Your not alone in your loss and pain.
9 years ago I got divorced after a marriage of 35 years, to a narcissistic man. And 4 years ago I stopped contact with my adult son. I just couldn’t handle it anymore. 2 narcissists in my life, it really is too much. My son now has 2 children. And every day my heart bleeds when I think of them.
That is the thing that so hard, not being able to see other family members. I know.
Praying for them is the only thing that can help them and you.
You nailed it, the grief is awful 😢
OMG! Thank you! I’m the mom! The grief and loss of my son? The guilt? What did I do wrong? Did I not hold him close enough as an infant? I can’t change the past! I had to figure out “radical acceptance” alone. I couldn’t explain to my world what I was going through. I have been grieving alone. 😢
Me too, His Father was a serious narcissist and a Dark Triad type.He abandoned our children when they were under 5 years old.The children did spend time with him when they were in high school.HIs family had a lot of money and the children were bascially bought off.I had my children early so my Son is 57 now.I expect him to be mature but he is not.He treats my granddaughter badly, invalidating and selfish.While I was just in the hospital he came and , for one hour, attacked me verbally so deeply that it was traumatic.He broke my heart. I have gone No Contact and am healing.I think I know the pain he has but that is not going to solve his porblem.I cannot help him.
E grief is real: grieving a parent or a partner who will die b4 u, n grieving a child who will outliv u? As a former teacher, how many kids did I know who were distorted n twisted by narcissism? Is it inborn? Is it external effects? Is it a combination? E pain n e grief r very real. We grieve w/ u. U r not alone.
I completely understand. I went through the same thing with my daughter. The pain and grief is awful.
Thank you Doctor . I haven’t heard from my daughter in a few weeks and I was going to send a text to see if she was ok . Every time I think of doing so I get sick to my stomach. I’m not going to text her, your video reminds me that there is nothing I can do to change her and by me reaching out to her will just open up days of grief and pain for me . Thank you ❤
I know the feeling. I never call. A short text stating I love her. Then she will call and it’s always awkward at best. That’s it.
I finally walked away from my daughters for good.
@@beverlyadams7205 I went no contact for a month and she went to other family members to get to me . They all know now not to let me know if she contacts them. It’s so hard and I’m so grateful for the Dr. and all of us who support each other 😊
@@beverlyadams7205 sometimes it’s what we need.
Narcisistic people lack empathy, are entitled , exploitative, egotistical and bullying and no matter if they are your parent, sibling, spouse or an adult child they are dangerous to our health and we must radically accept that painful fact as truth 😢 thank you dr Ramani ❤
Dr. Ramani is right on target with this message. Every single rotten stinking act of cruelty imaginable has been done to me by my narc daughters..yesss I have 2. Both identical to their narc father. For my own health, I had to cut ties, otherwise they would have destroyed me. I changed my legal directives and emergency contact info to exclude them bc they don’t care.
As a mom, it is hard to watch! My heart aches for my son, with no closure or positive outcomes. He struggles. He suffers! I will always love him. Double-bind.
❤ thank you for addressing this much needed topic.
My maternal love was defined as having faith in my daughter. I am an encourager by nature. It’s become hard to have faith in anyone. That was my career. This is so hard. Very painful christmas again. I’ve completely distanced. No more. That’s all I can do now.
Me too
Thank you so much for addressing this extremely sensitive and difficult topic. 👍❤
Thank you for addressing this issue Dr.Ramani. Now I know that I’m not alone !
Please provide more of this content. You have no idea how helpful it is for parents with narcissistic children!
My thoughts exactly. I have waited for this video and am so appreciative of you, Dr.Ramani .for addressing this subject.
Thank you for the tips. Hindsight is 20/20 and we didn’t recognize that behavior was actually narcissistic, but the damage that child has done over the years has been immense.
Dr. Ramani, I was wondering when you were going to talk on this topic. I am a single mom with a narcissistic adult daughter. As you just described, it is the single most challenging thing I have ever done – radically accepting!! I still get manipulated just like you described when she smiles or comes through on the simplest of things!! Of course, I beat myself up afterwards and tell myself to remember next time. The back and forth is quite frustrating and for me it’s been about money. I recently put my foot down on helping her financially and I am hoping that keeps her away, at least for now. I have even suggested co-counseling hoping that she will see reason with a facilitator around! She has not accepted. Thank you so much for addressing this topic and for helping me know that I am not alone ❤