Watch out if you ever do THIS to a narcissist
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Dr. Ramani, we hope you are safe amidst all the fire that’s going on in the LA area 😢 Our prayers for everyone’s safety❤
Central Time Zone- Nortb America: btw: technical support team and admin staff at Doctor Ramani Durvasula, Ph.D. ; thank you 😊: again; thank you 😊/ Austin, Texas – AUS
Wow good point. Yes👏🏻
They feel you bring out the worst in them..they’re not self aware.
They blame everyone else for their mood, behaviour, and actions. Never accountable!
But what they do is the opposite, they bring out the worst in others.
Ex said she started feeling sick after meeting me. I was like “well, if that’s the case, let me cure you”. That means no contact.
From a meme: Narcissists be like, “Yes I hurt you, but now you hate me, so I am the true victim.”
Yes, I’ve experienced this
Im living it after 3 years and much more that I can’t prove.😮
@@patriciawalker7077 I’m so sorry for you ❤️🩹
Yeah, and because I sent you a Christmas card, I am reaching out, and you are ignoring me, so YOU have a problem.🙄
My narc ex husbands words when I left after he cheated when my dad died, and also financially and emotionally abused me, were “it’s not fair”
Anything I’ve ever done that has been wrong or displeased my parents is the worst thing in the world. Anything they have done, I’m ungrateful, difficult, too sensitive or my favourite “you expect too much from people”! Did wonders for my psyche lol.
I remember my narc ex boyfriend, when I would try to talk to him about something he said/did that hurt me, he would say with a look of contempt “Wow, you really expect a lot out of me, don’t you”? As if I was the one with the problem!
@@christinelamb1167I really hate those looks of contempt. My mother and father have never been joyful at a success but they’re all over it with mistakes. Makes everything miserable. Life is damn hard enough as it is.
Narcissism labeled as a “personality style” is too kind. These people are just pure evil! 😮💨
Yeh I agree and even worse when u find out yr own mother been backstabbing u to other siblings that u don’t talk to anymore due to a fathers passing and the separation is all stemming from jealousy and envy! Come from them of course! I am done either way this family because I have been unsupported and used as the scapegoat to blame for everything! God sees I’m a truth teller and has been trying to show me all my enemies including the toxic ppl in my bloodline! The universe and god are my witnesses! I have done nothing wrong to these narcs it’s the other way around! I just mind my own business and try my best to get by in this thing called life?!!! 😇 I’m not perfect but I am not wicked, cold & fake like these ppl they are pure evil & cowards too!!!!
Exactly. Everyone is so kind calling it this i have many other names i can call them. More truthful names such as abusive personality behavior. APB this way we can get straight to the point. Evil personality type. Pure Evil.
Trust, loyalty and respect. If they fvck up one, they lose all three.
And thats a sure thing !!😂💯👏👏
From Austin, Texas – AUS: fwiw: thank you 😊 Doctor Ramani Durvasula, Ph.D. again: thank you 🙏
Well said!
@@youngblood8540 Yes.
All this began on Christmas Eve last year. I called out the narcissist without labeling them as such and was so triggered it took me a week to recover. Later, I dealt with a narcissistic enabler who excused the behavior by saying, ‘Oh, they’re just worried about someone.’ I replied, ‘That doesn’t give them the right to take it out on you.’ I was called childish and then blocked. At this point they’re gonna have to deal with that narcissist person. I am so glad I dodged the bullet.
I spent a week with my “person with strong narcissistic tendencies.” After this person left I had the worst sciatica attack of my life. I had no energy for a month, being essentially lifeless. I feel for all of the people who are stuck in narcissistic relationships and I thank the good doctor for explaining that not everyone has the ability to just walk away from the abuser. I asked a great (in all senses of the word) friend of mine when it became inescapable that his/her mother really wasn’t on her/his side. The response was it took until age 50 to stop trying to satisfy the mother. And my friend is incredibly bright and insightful. Have empathy for other victims and especially, BE NICE TO YOURSELF.
when you hurt the narcissist, he will hold it against you for years to come, bring it up again and again at every possible opportunity, and never ever forgive you, even if you did nothing on purpose and have apologized a hundred times.
mine holds my first pregnancy against me. yes, he is the father. we were already married. and yes, it happened 24 years ago.
Yeah like he was involved!! Insane mine did the same thing he was responsible because he wouldn’t use birth control it was my job !
Yes…Dr. Ramani, please be safe out there in Southern California. I miss living there, but my heart aches for you and all others who are enduring these tragedies. 😢 Sending ❤️❤❤love to you.
In my younger, funnier days, I once got tired of my evil stepmother degrading me by rubbing in my face in front of my father and others that my mother was insane, and without thinking it through I quipped: “well, dad knows how to pick ‘em lol”..
The coldness, cruelty, sabotaging, etc. from her that ensued for nearly a decade (before I finally went NC with my entire family) nearly destroyed my and my little daughter’s lives.
That’s great! Pure honesty. It’s amazing how they can hold grudges and be punitive for decades.
I think I like you! 😆 Sounds like something I might have let slip in my younger, less wise days. Glad you’re out now.
I pray every day, that the people around them realize their true face 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 thanks for your videos🫶🏼
I recently cut off my adoptive parents after 40 years of trying to deal with the physical and emotional abuse. I was in and out of state homes and fostercare before that. I don’t know where to begin. Thank you for the videos. I am cautiously moving forward.
I had to walk away from narcissistic parents 33 years ago because of physical and emotional abuse in my childhood and ongoing emotional abuse when I became an adult.
I cut off my mother almost 5 years ago, when I was 56 years old. It was so hard, but necessary after a lifetime of constant abuse. I couldn’t take the gaslighting, manipulation, and lies anymore! I was close to having a breakdown.
There is no way with these people. You are only good for them when getting their way or what they want.
@@sandrawamerdam2219 Exactly.
This quote from you is universal and should be written in a book of the most meaningful quotes ever spoken: “In the absence of truth, and trust, and honesty, there’s absolutely no possibility for a relationship.” This is exactly why forgiveness without true and faithful repentance is nothing but a license to the offender to continue. Forgiveness, in itself, is so often mistaken for the thing that will restore the relationship. So many – especially Christians – errant in this belief are shamed by others as if they were the perpetrator if they do not go along with this narrative. True REPENTANCE is the other partner that is required in the restored relationship dance.
Couldn’t agree more
They are vindictive hypocrites, without a shred of decency.
Without a shred of GENUINE decency. The can feign decency in public at all times.
That calmness he showed after having his meltdowns was the biggest surprise for me.
Like an addict who had gotten his fix?
Or how the meltdown destroys you or your children, then he turns around and is completely happy and finally in a good mood while you’re reeling. I used to think that maybe he was bipolar because the change-up was crazy. Now I realize the meltdown was intentional and felt good to him to wreck those around him.
@@wlckszlzkkn My narc has a diagnosis of bipolar disorder, but they also have a whole complex of narcissistic traits. The diagnosis came really late in life, after 60. They are also an alcoholic. That has made life incredibly confusing for me for the last 20 years and for them their entire life. 😳
OMG! Yes, I went on vacation with a narc who absolutely destroyed my vacation by humiliating me repeatedly in front of strangers for no reason ( he had me walking on eggshells as I was trying to avoid his tirades ). He then had the nerve to say that he was angry with me for making him lose his temper in front of other people! We came back to the US and I was shattered while he was refreshed and feeling brand new! Of course, there was no accountability. I was just too sensitive.
From Jan 2024 til today, this has been the worst and best year of my life. So much pain, toxicity, terrible things. And then so much love, help, light, supernatural gifts, answers to lifelong questions plus so much more.
If I had to do it all over again I would -hands-down.
Fact that I’m malleable and a teachable spirit is one of my saving graces.
I’m so glad to be here !!!
What a ride!
❤
Dr. Ramani, after enduring the whole narcissistic relationship from beginning to end, the trauma bond included, the worst and hardest part has not been from the narcissist. It was the case in the beginning. But the long term healing I face every day is from all my trusted friends who completely believed the narcissist and have totally turned their backs on me to this today. I’m pretty much over
the narcissist. But the betrayal trauma has been by far the most devastating part of the entire experience. 💔
Betrayal trauma the worse from family and professional areas
@@patricebest545 Especially from leaders in your own Church, or “spiritual space”.
The worst is when their betrayals are exposed, and then they gaslight you AND blame you for their betrayal.