What Happens If You Can’t Radically Accept the Narcissist?
Radical acceptance means fully recognizing that a narcissist’s behavior won’t change—but what if you just can’t get there? Many people stay stuck in cycles of hope, confusion, and self-blame, searching for ways to “make it work.” In this video, Dr. Ramani unpacks why radical acceptance feels so hard, and what it really costs when you can’t reach it.
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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.
I tried for 45yrs! I don’t know why I accepted it and I finally walked away.
Because they succeeded. But…the past is dead. You escaped.
Radical acceptance lessens suffering. You’re never going to win a fight with reality. Accept what is and then get very serious about loving yourself the way you used to love them: intensely. It gets better and easier day by day.
Exactly this!
Perfectly stated
When you can’t radically accept them, this becomes their negative fuel. They use it to intimidate, blame, and shame you.
Narcissists constantly seek validation attention and draw all focus to themselves while in the process or meanwhile the narcissist thinks they are superior to or a victim of a circumstance no one can change a narcissist. All narcissists don’t change whether it’s Classic Malignant Covert or Classic. No one can change a narcissist because they will argue till the end of the earth they are extremely entitled and often appear entertaining.
I am in a TON of mental and emotional anguish and pain over family dynamics. As an HSP, the fact I’m slower to recover is hard on me. Everyone is trying so hard everyone is working and fighting and lifting me up so much and they’re working so hard to try to make me feel better and I’m unable to produce the results that I want to give back quickly to show them how much I love all of the help and support. Because of my HSP and it’s weighing on me.
I will do everything possible and put in tons of tireless work , anything I have to do, whatever it is, to keep myself in check so that I am not coming from a place of narcissism.
I am communicating with my abusers. But only to get my truth out and not be silenced. I don’t expect positive results. I’m only hoping to get my truth down before they try to make it up and create their own stories for me
🙏🙏🙏
Results take time, that is ok. As far as communication with abusers.. just don’t expect them to do anything but obfuscate. They will distort the truth behind your back no matter what you say even if you say nothing. If it serves you do as you will. Talking to an empty room gives better feedback. At least you can hear the reverb. Have a great week!!!
It’s so funny that they are soooo sensitive about THEIR feelings when they don’t give a crap about YOUR feelings. Pathetic hypocrites.
And yet, they are so empty inside!
They don’t feel what you feel. They don’t have empathy. They don’t form natural emotional bonds. They are consumed by their own needs, their own wants and their own desires. And they don’t do self- reflect.
@@khanhnguyen-kg9ei very true!
I grieved that I grew up without that needed support before it was an uncomfortable swallow for a radical acceptance and when I finally placed a verbal boundary, handles flew and fast forward, NC. All because I wouldn’t want to “give” money because me and my wife are planning a move. Mind you, this is us starting from scratch without any help at all ie. vehicles, or hand me downs and stating before that we were saving money.
❤❤❤❤❤ Dr Ramani is in my autocorrect
I feel you are watching wht I feel and just want to ease my pain I feel you are like a saviour for me thank you dr Ramani from bottom of my heart for understanding and helping us through your videos
Whatever happened innour day to day life, I learned to not get.my hopes up regarding our relationship. I fully accepted that at any given moment I’d be treated negatively. 🍒
Radically acceptance is what led to true healing and stop getting caught in the cycle. The pain of the immediacy of reality from radical acceptance, is way more compassionate for myself, than the continued delusion and emotional control and upheavals from that person’s behavior. It allows you to stop getting caught into the emotional cycle where the narcissist wants you to be. You can become an observer without being so emotionally triggered. It’s true freedom.
They always get angry when we tell the truth!!!
It is better to radically accept than to radically deny! 😮
It’s also better than “radical grace” for a narcissistic psychopath
I believe I have done the radical accepting but he will do something and I will ruminate about it in my head for days and keep my anger/sadness in my head. I know there is no point in expressing these feelings. I need help learning how to stop doing that. I get extremely depressed and isolate myself because I think I would explode in anger. I don’t have hope for this relationship. I need to leave but need to do it in a smart way because he will destroy everything. Oh and there will be a horrible smear campaign. I already know this and am preparing myself for that.
Exactly
Forgiveness and wish them blessings otherwise as you are experiencing their hooks are still in you causing you evil
He, he, it’s none of our business what others say about us. It really isn’t. 😅
♥️ Thank YOU Dr Ramani 🫂
15:45 Yeah ✋🏼
It’s like quitting smoking. Several quitting attempts before the grand finale. Every time, saying yes, I am responsible for this, I allowed access. I expected it, and thought I could toughen up.
Yes! Took me 3 years and several break ups and no contact. Finally accepted what I’m dealing with.
Thank you. Only an hour ago I got sucked into the past when I ran into someone from the past. It did not take too long for me to realize what I did. I guess that is progress. Luckily I generally do not encounter people from the horrendous time in my life. This encounter just reminded me I have more work to do.
Radical acceptance does NOT change their behaviour but it does change ours.
I think I’m getting closer to radical acceptance. It takes time. It doesn’t happen all at once.
Thanx for the great vid……
Life is a rollercoaster in itself.Radical acceptance is another rollercoaster.
So now, in all my great wisdom, I have acquired the ability to co-create these rollercoasters instead of a double loop that i see coming can change my response and is just bumpy big potholes, or maybe only a big hill.
I have found being indifferent to the chaotic and toxic ppl helps me keep my sanity, which doesn’t always work. Lol. We can only control ourselves.
They were not and will not ever be a positive entity towards me. So now I have found solace in being my own.
I also have found that not only will humming increase my oxygen, but it is also a gateway to making me feel good about myself. I also include scream therapy and howling at the full moon. Along with many, many other ways of being inside my head. Lol. Bahaha.
Staying positive and loving to myself is acceptance, and finding happiness in myself is another rollercoaster.
Stay cool and groovy.
Sounds pretty wise to me. 😊
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! The last few videos have really helped me understand radical acceptance more! I loved the video where you said I don’t expect my cat to unload the dishwasher!