9 Things Men Notice Right After Sex (That You Don’t Realize)
What a man feels in the quiet minutes after sex β the afterglow window most women rush right past β quietly decides how close, how safe, and how attached he lets himself feel. π₯
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Most women think the moment sex ends is the moment they can stop paying attention. So they roll over, reach for their phone, or start quietly wondering what he's thinking. But for a man, the minutes right after are when his guard is lowest β and what happens in that window tells him more about how he feels with you than anything that came before it.
Here's what I want you to see β none of these 9 things are about performing or doing it "right." They're about what naturally happens when you let yourself stay soft, present, and unguarded in the afterglow instead of retreating. Once you understand what he's quietly registering in those moments, you stop second-guessing and start trusting that simply being there β relaxed, warm, real β is exactly what draws him closer.
Whether you're newly dating, in a long relationship wanting to feel close again, or stepping back into intimacy after a divorce β this is the insider male perspective most coaches won't give you.
βΌ IN THIS VIDEO βΌ
β Whether you stay close or pull away β and what each one tells him
β The first thing you say (and why it lands harder than you think)
β What it does to him when you reach for your phone
β The way you look at him once it's over
β How comfortable you are in your own skin in that moment
β What happens when you let him take care of you
β Why staying playful afterward stays with him
β Making him feel it was good for him, too
β Plus the deepest one most women never realize: letting the silence be comfortable β and why that quiet is where he falls
None of these are moves. They're the small, real things that happen when you stay present instead of retreating the second it's over. Once you see what each one does to a man in that unguarded window, you stop rushing past it β and start trusting that the relaxed, real you is exactly who he wants to stay close to.
If you've been searching for what men really feel after sex, male psychology and emotional attachment, how to deepen intimacy and connection, or dating and intimacy advice for women over 40 β this is the insider breakdown.
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βΌ RELATED VIDEOS YOU'LL LOVE βΌ
π₯ 7 Things YOU Do During Sex That Drive Him WILD (That You Don't Even Know About)
π₯ 12 Things Men Notice During Sex (that Women Have NO Idea About!)
π₯ 8 Things Men Notice About Your Body During Sex (That You Don't Realize)
π₯ 7 Things Men Notice WHILE Cuddling You (That They'll NEVER Tell You!)
βΌ ABOUT MAT βΌ
Mat Shaffer is a former attorney turned dating and relationship coach for women. He helps women understand the way men actually think, feel, and connect β from inside the male mind.
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βΌ CHAPTERS βΌ
0:00: What he's actually feeling in the minutes after
2:15 #1: Whether you stay close or pull away
4:04 #2: The first thing you say
6:15 #3: If you reach for your phone
7:37 #4: The way you look at him after
9:11 #5: How comfortable you are in your skin
11:31 #6: Whether you let him take care of you
13:33 #7: If you stay playful
15:37 #8: Making him feel it was good for him too
17:54 #9: Letting the silence be comfortable
20:21 Final thoughts: the real you is what draws him close
π¬ Which of these 9 hit home the most? Drop it below ππ₯
Loved this
Really glad it resonated. π
Good morning .good information . thanks
Good morning to you too, thanks for being here. π
#5. I see no point to cover up. He’s seen girly parts of me that I haven’t – i like to be eaten out & my man is a guru.
Owning your own pleasure and confidence without apology, that’s the energy that draws the right kind of attention. π₯
Love this content! β€
Means a lot, thank you. β€οΈ
I ΔΊearn somthing almost every timeβ€ listening from Cobenhagen Denmark β€β€
Love that, glad it’s landing all the way from Copenhagen. β€οΈ
Hi Mr. Mat.
This is my dad is accunt.
But i’m a 17 year old girl.
I started watching your videos a month before i turned 17.
Your videos are the best.
I watch all of your videos.
Things my mom does not like to talk about even my dad.
Hehe π .
But keep doing your videos they are amazingπ
π
A lot of these apply in the other direction as well.
Exactly!! What about men who do all these same things…
There are plenty of guys that are perceptive, even during sex, but what they mostly want to do right after, is fall asleepπ
Apparently it’s a hormonal thing and they can’t help it.
LOL I remember a cold snowy night with an old lover, I was in town, so he ditched his friends for me (LOL!) It was the night after Thanksgiving and I was upstate visiting my family for the Holiday. He had me over, and we had turkey leftovers (God he could cook!) and wine, then he started nuzzling my ear when we were hanging out in front of the fire. One thing let to another and he carried me to his bedroom and it was great! SO great. Then after a little quiet afterplay, he fell asleep in my arms, and I cuddled him and stroked his hair and his back and fell asleep under him. He usually had more energy but the turkey made him sleepy as well as the action. It is one of my favorite memories of my HS sweetheart, ( we would still hook up for years after.) While we had a falling out due to his drinking and jealousy years later, I still really miss him and those great times all of these years later.
Curious what he’s ACTUALLY noticing about you in bed? Take my free 2-minute quiz and find out β https://matshaffer.typeform.com/to/ZFhuDDN5
My belly is full of deep stretch marks and big surgery scar. And my exes stared at my body with disgusted eyes, and they never wanted me so they cheated on me. I’m scared of showing my body to my boyfriend, even though he is very sweet I can’t be confident if he would feel the same after he sees my belly in the light.
It is how YOU feel about your body that is what makes a man disgusted or not, NOT your stretch marks! (unless he is a real POS, then just get rid of him! you obviously had men who once they knew your insecurities, they used them against you! Don’t show a man your insecurities, be CONFIDENT!) I have stretch marks, (from puberty, as well as weight loss) but am not at all embarassed or uncomfortable about them, and some of my boyfriends didn’t want to let me go BECAUSE of my confidence and willing to both give and receive a good time! I never even for a second let any man know that I am insecure about anything. I bet you magnify your flaws in your mind, and they aren’t as big or bad as you think. Your boyfriend cares about you and wants to be with you, NOT your insecurities. You need to be more positive about all that your body does for you. Maybe take a belly dancing class for sensuous movements, or a how to be sexy course. (they have to have something like that!) Please be more positive, it makes a difference. Confidence is SEXY! Good luck, I hope that this helps! Keep on watching Mat too, he is great!
Omgoodness. You have got to narrow this down a little !πI’m busy..
Adding to this: If you are not relaxing and feel great and want to be playful afterwards etc… don’t hide that to spare his feelings. Maybe he wasn’t considerate or warm or fun even if he wanted to be. If it wasn’t incredible, don’t lie lol! Note when something even subtly wasn’t right, so you can communicate what you prefer before you get back into bed and into that vulnerable position again.
OMG this made me feel great! I’m purrrfect in bed! : ) π€£