The Psychological Cruelty of Narcissistic Relationships

@MiaMillan-n6i says:

Now that I think back on my life with that person, it was so sick. The control, the evil, sleep deprivation, cruelty, constant threats and pain in more ways than one, AT THE SAME TIME. ❤️‍🩹😭🙏 Beyond evil…

@AnnVanCleve-p2c says:

OMG!! This is soo true!! I NEVER HAD FRIENDS OVER BECAUSE THEY DID NOT CARE FOR MY HUSBAND!! My entire personality changed. It was unbelievable! I DID NOT know this was happening to me until I finally left after 17 years!

@susieod11 says:

Narcissism is insidious

@paey-p3 says:

The saddest thing about narcisistic abuse is that it’s needless, makes no sense, occurs for no reason, and can permanently damage the victim’s sense of identity, self-worth, and ability to trust in others. I don’t have any mental- healthcare credentials, to be clear. However, I could write ten books about how it feels to be a victim of such abuse; and how difficult it can be to recover from. Victims of narcissistic abuse will often suffer for years, even long after the abusive relationship has ended. This kind of abuse has one sole purpose, which is to feed the narcissist’s need to feel; superior, dominant, and omnipotent by draining the victim of their mental, emotional, and often financial stability. Narcissistic abuse is not just about someone “temporarily losing it” after a bad day. It’s not about stress or even dishonesty, falling out of love or cheating etc. Although narcisists may engage in such behaviors; not every cheating, dishonest, or even self-absorbed person is a narcissist. Not all batterers are necessarily narcissists ( although many probably are). Narcissism is like the worst possible behaviors towards others, multiplied by at least 10; then added to that is the narcissist’s inability to feel conpassion or empathy for others. Narcissistic Abuse is a calculated means of controlling someone else’s behaviors and thought processes via extreme mental, and emotional bullying and outright emotional blackmail; commonly (but not alway) accompanied by physical abuse. Narcissists will tell you the sky is red. If you disagree and say the sky is actually blue, they’ll tell you you’re crazy, stupid, and incapable of distinguishing different colors. When you go outside and point to the sky and say, “ The color of the sky is clearly blue”, the narcissist will respond with, “ Of course it is, that’s what I’ve been saying all along!” Do you see how insane this is? It would be quite hilarious if it weren’t for the fact that the entire purpose of an argument such as the one above, is to cause the victim to start questioning his or her own sanity. If the victim of such abuse doesn’t recognize what’s going on, they will slowly begin questioning their own judgement and sanity. These techniques are also frequently used with gaslighting. Gaslighting is the act if purposefully confusing someone through circular, unending arguments; or may occur by moving or removing a victim’s objects such as keys, phone, other items- all in an effort to trick the person into thinking they’re going crazy. An example: “Where is my wallet? I know I put it in my purse last night. Now I don’t have my checkbook, cash, etc. I must be losing it!” Most people can’t imagine why someone would purposely cause such confusion and chaos for someone else, therefore never suspect the narcissist unless they’re caught. Even then, the narcissist will likely deny any accusations… The narcissist’s main goals- is to reap havok, chaos, and dysfunction into an otherwise mostly normal person’s life. What’s more, the perpetrator will purposefully cause the victim into a reaction, then use that reaction to gain support from their”flying monkeys”. These agents of narcissists are carefully picked, so that the narcissist’s view cannot be debated by an objective observer. This triangulation also causes the victim to further doubt or dismiss their own thoughts and feelings. Narcissistic abuse is complete and total psychological warfare against another human being. The targeted person can be the NPD’s children, but is often the NPD’s spouse or significant other. Children of narcissists are also more likely to become narcissists themselves due to genetic and environmental factors. Or, they may have BPD or BPD tendencies. That’s not to say that ALL children of NPD’s have personality or mental-health disorders. Targets of those with NPD are usually very generous, often sensitive, and friendly people that have their lives at least somewhat together. NPD’S choose these kinds of people for a reason, because the reality is NPD’s are empty human beings full of self-hatred. They are inwardly chaotic, and this chaos often translates into either an extremely neat and tidy exterior facade or may manifest into complete disorder and mess. I don’t sympathize with those with NPD because they aren’t psychotic- they do know the difference between right and wrong. They just choose to do wrong, choose to purposely hurt others because it boosts their often very tiny, fragile egos. These are dangerous people, and the only difference between most of them and a common murderer is that they haven’t physically murdered anyone yet. Well, most of time. Additionally, when dealing with a narcissist, the secrecy, emotional distance, and constant excuses can leave you questioning your partner’s faithfulness. If you suspect infidelity, you can reach out to MetaspyHub@gmail. com to learn about discreet ways to investigate your concerns.