The Quiet Way Narcissists Take Your Joy
How do narcissistic relationships take your joy — and why does it happen so gradually you don’t even notice? Joy isn’t usually taken all at once, but chipped away through criticism, invalidation, and control. Over time, you may stop doing the very things that once made you feel like yourself. In this video, we break down how joy gets lost in these relationships — and what it takes to start reclaiming it.
ORDER MY NYT BESTSELLING BOOK 📖 "IT'S NOT YOU"
JOIN MY HEALING PROGRAM
JOIN THE DR. RAMANI NETWORK
VISIT MY WEBSITE
RECOMMENDED RESOURCES AND HOTLINES
LISTEN TO MY PODCAST "NAVIGATING NARCISSISM"
Apple Podcasts:
Spotify:
Stitcher:
iHeart Radio:
DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.
Narcissists hate being left out
When you’re in the light of fun 🤩 narcissists take it personally
Nobody warns you that losing yourself doesn’t feel like a crisis, it feels like “just adjusting.” Then one day you realize you haven’t done the things you love in months. This video is so important.
Amen!
Just like the boiling frogs
Right, I adjusted myself until there was nothing left of me anymore. He said “You’re not the same person I married.” Really? Because I spent years trying to make an angry unhappy person happy? Then I had to endure a smear campaign in a small town! No good deed goes unpunished. My Dad said, “What happened to you, shouldn’t happen to a dog!” Yep, he said that! These monsters aren’t worth a second glance.
@edelweiss_debergbaldrian😮😮😮..that’s bad. *Virtual hug*
💯💯💯💯💯
Yes, I’ll never understand why the narcissist has worked so hard to destroy our relationship while the possibilities of having a good life have always been available to them.
This is what they do .
Again and again .
My narc could have good friends , good family relations ,neighbours ,colleagues ,even a good woman.
But no .He poisoned everything.
There is ,of course ,a new supply that will be destroyed ,too .
And the poor narc will be the victim again.
Is it bad that im wondering how much relief there will be when they are dead i went back like a sucker. They never seem to get any consequences to their actions its all just a game to them
Setting boundaries with a narcissists is like trying to hug a porcupine it’s really uncomfortable
A narcissist will never change
When dealing with a narcissist don’t defend don’t engage don’t explain don’t personalize
DEEP
When a narcissist blames you remember a narcissist will never change also remember it’s not you
Even 8 years post separation, I’ve started noticing myself experiencing joy with my family and my fiancé. It still surprises me how I can feel this joy without having to worry about dealing with my ex starting a fight afterwards. Its so so nice.
There was a time I wondered why my joy so disturbed my partner, actually brought out the worst in him. I enjoyed seeing him happy, it brought out the good in me. Well, now I know and it’s very sad that I’ve conditioned myself to downplay my joy or just not share it with him at all.
Narcissists only feel what’s good for them
Screw those narcissists. We do not need them…
except in canada where due to the way the charter of rights and freedoms is written, exclusive powers are given to the representative class, a body of people whom are highly narcissistic who hold institutional power traditions and money as leverage against anybody and anything that threatens their image based rule.
@Itsgone99it’s not any different than the US then 😩
The narcissist motto “ I’m not happy until you’re not happy “.
Proly the best ever 1 sentence summary of them!
😂 yes
Omg so true!
Unfortunately it s the truth
My ex-husband would come in mad and start in on me. Once I was upset, he was just fine. I have been divorced for almost 14 years. He wasn’t the first nor the last to hurt me and my peace. I still tense up when someone comes in the door. Working to help ease my body’s reactions is the hardest part.
I didn’t realize that your mom died. I’m so sorry to hear about that. I remember you bring her on for a collaboration on another podcast and you gave this great welcoming introduction. I wish you a speedy recovery from the mental pain that you are going through.
They always have to make it about them.
And so often as a victim of everyone else, especially the partner.
Years of invalidation and emotional withdrawal are enough to make you feel you have no joy and no dignity left! You simply bleed in silence!
💯
Laughing out loud at the TV, singing and even dancing to some 80s song, slowly but surely I’m finding my way back, one small spark of joy at a time
By the time I was 5 I knew it was too dangerous to smile or like anything. I spent my childhood watching the world from a silent space. Today I’m free. I keep journals of gratitude and daily wins. Its possible to heal from these evil creatures.
Same here. God bless
Im going to write down everytime I feel joy. They stole my joy for 13 years 😢
One day for no apparent reason I realized I couldn’t remember the last time I laughed, then I realized I couldn’t remember the last time I smiled, then I realized I couldn’t remember the last time I felt joy or happy or anything except numb or anxious or this weird heaviness. After he left, I cried every day almost all day because I had spent so much time limping toward so much sadness. 4 years out, there isn’t a day I don’t laugh at something, but there are few days I don’t cry at something because to feel all the feels is so joyous. I thank you, Dr. Ramani, for walking with me— even virtually. Being seen is joyous.