Why am I the ONLY ONE who sees the narcissist’s behavior?
What if you're the only one who sees the narcissist clearly? You're not imagining it. Narcissistic people often charm or intimidate everyone else, leaving you feeling isolated, self-doubting, and even ashamed for noticing the truth. This video explores why others don’t see what you see, how systems protect the narcissist, and why trusting your perception—especially when no one else does—is a radical and courageous act of healing.
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DISCLAIMER: THIS INFORMATION IS FOR EDUCATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY AND IS NOT INTENDED TO BE A SUBSTITUTE FOR CLINICAL CARE. PLEASE CONSULT A HEALTH CARE PROVIDER FOR GUIDANCE SPECIFIC TO YOUR CASE. THIS VIDEO DISCUSSES NARCISSISM IN GENERAL.
THE VIDEO DOES NOT REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AND SHOULD NOT BE USED TO REFER TO ANY SPECIFIC PERSON, AS HAVING NARCISSISM. PERMISSION IS NOT GRANTED TO LINK TO OR REPOST THIS VIDEO, ESPECIALLY TO SUPPORT AN ALLEGATION THAT THE MAKERS OF THIS VIDEO BELIEVE, OR SUPPORT A CLAIM, THAT A SPECIFIC PERSON IS A NARCISSIST. THAT WOULD BE AN UNAUTHORIZED MISUSE OF THE VIDEO AND THE INFORMATION FEATURED IN IT.
The ultimate enabler? Family Court.
Oh yes. So very exasperating.
Ugh. It’s heartbreaking.
Absolutely! My ex gaslit the entire court system in his community, stole the kids from his ex wife, only to abuse them and continue to get away with it.. sad. Seems like there’s no justice for those children
Absolutely yes! Hostile to victims and patient with the litigious abuser.
@@masquarra: Many authorities in the US are like this. They will bolster the more powerful or affluent party and ignore or punish the one who is lesser in social status.
I see it all the time.
Hang in there, truth tellers. It took a while for some of my other family members to wake up, but some of them did.
I “see dead people” now too! You saved my sanity Dr Ramani. How can we all repay you for how you have enlightened us? I think of you often and pray for you. Thank you doesn’t begin…
When “I Got It”. I was so Thankful and Happy! I finally figured it out and all of a sudden I knew I wasn’t crazy! You! Are the one that turned the light bulb on in my head.. THANK YOU SO MUCH, Dr. Ramani! ❤
Often feel like the character from Greek myth, Cassandra. Cursed to see the future and always tell the truth, but always believed to be a liar and ignored.
That’s actually my name so double Casandra vibes for me
THIS!!!
This is the way for so many truth-tellers, seers, visionaries, irl and all throughout mythologies around the world
This knowledge has saved and ruined my life at the same time. I’ve studied narcissism for years now. For all the usual reasons. Most of the time I’m the only one who understands the dynamics of what’s going on around us. It’s lonely. It’s isolating. It’s scary because others don’t always heed the warnings that I try to give them. I’m able to protect myself better than I’ve ever been able to in my life. But I walk in a different world than other people do. Once you really start to see it you can’t unsee it, and you’ll carry it with you forever. And it costs.
It costs dearly. My family’s dysfunction has cost a lot. I don’t try to tell anyone anything about anyone else anymore, because they refuse to open their minds and eyes and ears, or watch body language, and then I’M the one with ‘issues’. I moved away and went silent years ago. Now those problem siblings are trying to hoover me back through my boys, or make me jealous, or something. It’s Soooo hard. Enablers love them or fear them.
I agree, I finally found a friend that gets it but that is because she had an ex mother in law that was a narcissist. Whenever my friend starts to defend my sister (who is currently trying to torture me) I just remind her of her mother in law and then she goes oh yea. First, you have to live it, then you have to see it. Few people are willing to see it. People will always take the path of least resistance.
I am in the same situation, i I feel very lonely…
You words cut like a knife. I felt every word so viscerally. I’m 52 and only woke up several years after all the usual experiences. Although awareness saved me too, It’s been incredibly lonely and I’ve isolated ever since.
Thank you for sharing. It’s comforting to know I’m not alone and not as insane as I once was lead to believe x
I feel the same way, you are not alone .
Thank you for this. For years, I saw the dysfunction in my family and felt like I was in the Twilight Zone and losing my mind. I’ve learned that sometimes people are invested in denial and not knowing. 😢
Thank you for this video Dr. Ramani and to the person who sent the question. My mother is a super cruel narcissist to my sister and I but she puts on a mask and she’s very charming , positive and helpful with people. Everybody thinks that she’s amazing and generous, but then she takes her mask off and tortures my sister and I. We are the only ones who know that she has NPD.(sorry if I made any English mistakes).
Your English is perfect.
Please start investing your mental focus and energy in the future you want to build 2 years from today, and – in your mind – invalidate/ignore her charm on others as if it’s not happening. From my experience – narcs make the best impression only for a short time before people start to catch up but you have the power to either let that fake charm stick long term or not. In your house, you are as much of a human as your mother and your convictions/version of reality hold as much power as you give them. you might not have the power to do anything about it, but you have the power to know you are 100% right and stop playing along with your mom’s version. checkout Jerry Wise Road to Self program – he gives good tips on learning to build and assert your independence from such people.
You did great! ❤
I’m with number six, people don’t want to get it. Dr. Scott Peck said he thought the “original sin ” was laziness. I agree.
This was a much needed video for me. In my healing journey I am now at the point of explaining – only to find that people don’t get it. They don’t want to get it. Some can’t. Am already keeping my distance from the narcs in my life, I will no longer try to explain why. It does get lonely, my peace is more important though. Thank you, Dr Ramani!
So terrible when there are these narcissistic people who runs the Court Systems . Destroying people lives & getting away with it.
For many of us, the abuse only happens at home. When everyone else is well treated by the narcissist it’s no wonder they don’t understand.
I was told, “But I always thought he was such a nice guy.”
He is, if you don’t live with him.
I noticed early on my ex and family were very careful not to allow outsiders to see their mask slip, and especially aware that there aren’t any witnesses nearby to overhear what transpired in a one on one conversation—which was startling at times.
What a pack of despicable fraudsters they were—but little by little it’s all coming back to bite them in the butt, and maybe even tear a chunk out of it.
It means so much when even just one other person in the circle sees the truth about the narcissist. Eventually I knew the truth, but it sure made me feel good to have a little validation.
Thank you Dr. Ramini.
Totally agree Dr. Ramani. Wish I never started studying psych 101. It completely sucks being able to see the truth while others are like… Uh, What? Your crazy. Not hardly. Peace Love and Respect. Scapegoat Warriors United. With Great Power. Comes Great Responsibility
She’s certainly not alone. It is and always has been very lonely awareness.
I totally understand this.
One of my “great supports that see it” is my Bible. Never does it mince words regarding what these people are like. And when I read it for myself I see plenty of “leave that place and shake the dust off your feet,” “avoid those people,” and “what do darkness and light have in common?” I asked for spiritual insight, and believe I receive it because of my prayers. Strength and peace to you.
I see it. It can be a lonely existence. I’ve sharpened my discernment. I’ve found peace and harmony but it has been a long haul.
So spot on Dr Ramani, my wife is a communal narcissist. People regard her in our circle as a Florence Nightingale figure, with maybe some Joan of arc and ❤a touch of mother. Teresa. Her enablers which are my daughters and their husbands most specifically are direct beneficiaries of being monkeys for her. I left a year ago after 38 years. Fortunately, I have a couple of close friends who have watched me go through hell and now understand at least to some degree about narcissistic abuse. In the meantime, over the years my health has been destroyed. My immune system is completely cratered and I takeall kinds of meds to function. Fortunately I have a son who grew up with those part of the time and he also was on the butt end of her manipulation so he has stepped in to be by support. So thankful to God for him. I advise anybody still in these relationships to get out because guaranteed eventually your health will fail. Your nervous system can’t take the strain.❤
I am glad you got out, be kind to yourself. It sounds like you are describing my mother. Except my dad passed at 60 from cancer. I was 26. I always tried to understand him but never saw it and blamed him for the families financial difficulties. I went from the flying monkey to the scape goat. I only clicked at 37 after another bad smear campaign that lasted 2 years. I did not understand what I had done wrong except fall pregnant and get married. The guilt I felt that my Dad never got to be who he truly was and to be appreciated for the genius he was. It so hard to cut ties with family, some you actually like. Thankfully my husband saw it too. Those people are gold. My sister’s have openly said they don’t want to hear it even though I know my youngest saw it as a child and was closer to my dad. My mom love bombed her properly after he passed to build her army. My mom loves being around dying people.
@@lot-g2ithank you
For some, it’s like ..”Don’t bother me with the facts. My mind is made up.” Objectively sharing key incidents/situations best. Saying way too much it’s likely to be dismissed as a smear campaign. Rock and a hard place.
For most of my adult life I didn’t get it. I’m 70. I was raised by a mother with narcissistic tendencies. I had problems with serious relationships until my 40s. My younger sister let her mask slip, unfortunately I was the only one that saw it. Even my daughter believed her. It’s taken me till now to heal ab be my happy healthy self. It was a lot of work and will likely continue to be. I’m up for it.
Thank you for this video. It explains soooooooo much. The concept of a narcissistic system is new to me, but I’ve experienced it multiple times. There are so few others, if any, that see what I’m seeing – even as it’s slapping them around.
I’m the bad guy for pointing it out. I don’t bother to do that anymore. It’s not worth the blowback.